The bad influence friend is coming to dinner and I'm freaking out

Lounge
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Some of you may remember me talking about my husband’s friend that is a terrible influence and all around bad guy.

I mentioned that he was moving to California and that scared me.

Fears have been realized and set into motion as he now lives an hour away and is coming to a dinner party we’re having this weekend.

What the ■■■■ am I supposed to do?

I loathe this guy.

Plus, I’m super embarrassed that I’ve gained weight.

He’s 100% going to run and tell everyone we know how fat I’ve gotten.

How do you put aside those kinds of feelings to enjoy a dinner party?

I don’t know if I can.

I don’t know if I want him in my house ever again.

At the same time I’m kind of sick of hating him and want it to be over.

I still wouldn’t like or respect him, or want him around, but it wouldn’t be a weird thing anymore.

I guess we’ll ■■■■■■■ see what happens Saturday.

■■■■.

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Honestly just don’t let him in your house if you hate him that much. Maybe work towards some sort of compromise with your partner that you can both agree with.

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Igh I am sorry. If it was me I would probably just boycot the party. Tell my husband he can order a pizza and then go out for the night.

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I think ninja is spot on with this advice.

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Skipping out isn’t a bad idea.

The thing is,

The more I think about it,

This guy is going to be around.

I don’t want to be the ■■■■■ wife that hates everyone.

I want to put the ugliness behind us but this isn’t the setting for that.

I still won’t trust him ever.

Or respect him ever.

But I may be able to put up with him on a short term basis.

Or at the very least not be a jerk.

I don’t know.

This is confusing and it sucks.

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I should also mention this guy had to put his dog down this week and is living alone until his wife can move out to California in a few weeks with her job.

I feel bad for him.

No matter what kind of person you are,

That hurts.

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If he is a bad person why let him in your house even

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Just go out and do something fun. It’s how I’m coping with my brother-in-law showing up tomorrow on almost no notice. His inability to notify people ahead of time with things is how I spent Xmas alone last year.

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Yeah. In a perfect world, our partners would not stay friends with people who are awful to us. But I have been on both sides of that equation, and it is super hard to stop caring for someone. Especially if you think you can help them.

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Are you f-n kidding me? If he says something like that throw him out. What an a-hole!

I’m sorry you have to deal with him!

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From my last fight with my wife over her family:

“To you they’re relatives - to me they’re collateral damage.”

I have no idea how I’m still married.

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If I have to meet up with someone I don’t like I never do it at my place but go to a restaurant. Then I leave when I’m fed up and can’t take it anymore.

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Mr. Star once told me the way he copes with a few of my relatives is by mentally thinking of them as a species of bug. They are an unavoidable part of certain environments, and they disgust everyone, but I would cry if he squished them

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^^^ I am so stealing that.

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Semi-relevant:

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I am not liable for any divorces that may result from that choice

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I totally :heart: The Kids In The Hall!! The head-crushing guy is a favorite :laughing:!!

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You’re getting custody of the kid.

And the cat.

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Why does this always happen to me…

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