I had an episode last night and I’m getting sort of hopeless. Would anyone share some of their lowest points in their illness if you’re comfortable with that, and where your life is at today after your recovery?
I want to recover, I’m seeing a psychiatrist for a diagnosis soon, but some days it seems hopeless. It’s like everyone knows something that I don’t. I want to get better and be happy again, and live a relatively comfortable life.
Any success stories?
My rock bottom was driving my car psychoticly (I shouldn’t go into details) but I got a slew of charges including a felony or two. Now five years later. Like Eminem said “I hit rock bottom so hard I bounced twice”. That’s why it’s take five years because I bounced like ten times. But now life is pretty good! I’m not a rockstar yet but I enjoy life. It gets better!
My rock bottom was standing on the balcony on the 7th floor about to jump cause I was hearing voices and had delusions that the government was after me, now I’ve held a job for almost the past 2 years and feeling very positive no symptoms of hearing voices and delusions … I live a fairly “normal life” just enjoying friends and family and being productive at work 
My rock bottom was being taken from a psych ward to a jail cel for being out of control and aggressive. I used to live in Aspen Colorado and went from having a high paying job selling real estate and skiing 60 plus days a year to being psychotic and delusional, throwing away all of my possessions because I thought they had tracking devices on them. I ran up thousands in debt and ruined my credit, lost my significant other and had to move. The loneliness that accompanies recovery from a psychotic break is also very painful. I have been lucky enough to have periods of sustained remission where I got almost all of my faculties back with the exception of med side effects, worked, dated, had friends etc. The biggest obstacle I find is med compliance. The side effects can be really tough, but its maintenance and someday soon they will have more palatable meds.
Are you better these days though? You seem like a nice person.
What are some of the bad side-effects of sz meds? I’m still trying to decide which treatment would be best for me. At least I hope my doctor will take my opinion into account lol
Mental illness is unfair, that’s for sure. Especially the debilitating ones.
I don’t want to scare you but they liken antipsychotic meds to “chemo therapy” for mental illness. weight gain, sexual side effects, body stiffness, and restlessness are the most bothersome for me. I used to be an avid runner/skier/fitness buff and Ive had to make some serious concessions.
My doctor calls it “radical acceptance” if you’re lucky, you might be able to get away with a low dose and then its not so bad. i still have to remind myself of how serious the illness is almost on a daily basis to keep from stopping my meds.
That…sounds so terrible lmao but I like that you were still honest with me. Like chemo for mental illness, I’ll probably never forget that. I hope these newer medications are more effective/less harsh than that.
Also, “concessions” seems like a very apt term to use.
what med are you on? I’m on abilify 20 my and have few sideeffects. Still have some symptoms but it’s not all that bad. You’ve been fighting this illness longer than me so maybe you just have bad luck with meds, or maybe I have good luck. But it’s not all too bad to me. I do have real bad adedonhia (sp) cognition problems and delusions. But life isn’t too bad. I’m lucky in a lot of ways.
Thanks, you seem nice too. you sound like you’ve got a lot on the ball still. Its daunting but try to keep a positive attitude. Its best if you don’t take yourself to seriously, which is hard not too,
I am fortunate in that I have a loving supportive family, whom without I would most certainly be destitute. Its a struggle Im not gonna lie, and yea its totally unfair, but I will say that you can still forge a solid identity and people will respect you for your struggle. For me its all about getting through it as gracefully as possible. Its a legitimate condition and you may find that things that once came easily to you are now much more difficult. It can be a real lesson in humility. I was a college kid with a lot of friends, very high functioning and destined for law school. I developed a drug problem and ended up in a fancy California rehab where I had my first break. If I can help in any way let me know.
Im on latuda. The problem is that I have been taken off meds numerous times over the last fifteen years. Or I just say ■■■■ it and stop taking them myself. This is the first time Ive been totally med complaint so I guess I’m down for the long haul now. Im finally not willing to have another episode.
That’s good news! Need to stay on meds. I’ve been on them almost three years now and continue to improve. After a 3 year span of being on and off meds which never worked. Taking antipsychotics as prns doesn’t work
Do the meds really help with the delusions/hallucinations?
yea I didn’t want to scare you but I liked that too Chemo for mental illness lol you hear the strangest things in these circles. There was a time I felt like I was afflicted with a class illness, they told me I had bipolar disorder. I don’t know, it doesn’t have to define you. Did this just happen to you? Im sorry you’ve had this experience
I’ve been struggling with it for around 2 years so far. I finally decided to see a doctor recently, and hopefully take a major step towards recovery by doing so.
They did for me
yes for me they do, and once they tame the symptoms you usually take less of them, or just enough to keep them at bay. The doctors are aware that the meds are difficult to take and they may empathize. some meds are better than others and its trial and error.
My lowest point was starving myself because I thought scientists in clown masks were trying to put parasites in my food, failing in school from the stress, no job, a physically abusive boyfriend because I thought I couldn’t do any better, and only showering once a week and not brushing my teeth because I let my illness destroy all the motivation I had to even get out bed every morning. Now I’m engaged, my fiancé and I live on our own, I have a well paying new job, I’m always well dressed with my hair and makeup done, I finished trade school, and I’m 11 weeks pregnant with my first baby.
congratulations! glad to hear that things really turned around for you.
Thanks I hope that my story can inspire other people with mental illness to keep going. I know a couple people with depression and they always tell me that I help them keep fighting to recover. That’s my biggest goal. I want to give other people hope that things can get better
yea man, thats a great comeback story. Depression doesn’t seem like much but it can be really bad too