It’s stress from my situation at the new college, and the likelihood of losing my job very soon. Teaching never used to be stressful for me, though it still isn’t at the old college. Teaching used to be my fun job, besides having a side job that I hated.
I recently quit my side job partly because I hated it, but also because I felt like it was affecting my teaching at the new college. That course is a ton of work, not only for the students but also for me. If I lose that teaching job I’m financially ■■■■■■■
There’s another college interested in me; it would be great to land a job there, but even if I do it won’t help me financially until late January or early February. The next semester there starts in early January.
This is just too much stress right now.
Sorry to ■■■■■ so much, but I needed to vent. I’m overwhelmed.
I’m sorry you’re so overwhelmed. It’s still your first semester at the new college. Once you have the material all set, it will be much easier to teach the class again next year. You are capable of this. I’ve seen you survive things that would knock most people flat on their asses. You feel like crap now, but you can stick with it. And you’ll survive, and then you’ll succeed.
I don’t think there’s going to be a next year for me at that college. I’m not even sure I’ll be teaching the next seven-week semester, which starts the week after next.
Yesterday I had to meet with my lead faculty member, my department chair, and my associate dean. There has been a “rash of complaints” about me and my teaching. They think I’m an ineffective instructor, and I suppose I am when it comes to trying to teach a course with a tremendous amount of material in a seven-week format.
This is actually my second semester teaching that course there, though last winter it was in a 15 week format. My students did awful that semester, too.
It’s something new that the college is trying; there is research that backs the approach. With seven-week classes, taking two classes counts as a full load; by taking only two classes, the student can devote more time to each class. Not all classes are like that, but the one I teach has gone to a seven-week format.
I’m wondering what your automotive situation is like. If you have a durable car you might consider delivering pizza as a side job. They’re always hiring drivers, and they might be willing to work with you on the hours. They reimburse you for your gas, and with tips you’re making a little more than minimum wage. Delivering pizza is relatively low stress for a fast food job. You might think about it. As for your teaching job - ask for time to adapt to the curriculum. They’ll probably realize they can’t replace you.
My car is reliable, but it is terrible in winter road conditions. It’s the worst I’ve ever had when it comes to that. The snow and ice will be here soon.
I would say they can replace me. Maybe not for the next seven-week semester, but certainly after that. I would be okay even with just getting through that semester. Or maybe in the winter I could teach a different course, like general bio, something more in my wheelhouse, but I would need my faculty lead to help me get in with the person who runs that course. I don’t know, we’ll see, but I don’t think it looks good.
Can you submit your resume online on Indeed? Literally blast your resume to whatever jobs you’d like and/or jobs that are eager to hire. I know job hunting sucks and you’re probably tired of hearing it, but it sounds like your its your best bet for now. Maybe you can work a second job at the first campus, like in student support or their call centre? I’m so sorry, it seems like you can’t seem to catch a proper break
I agree with what everyone is saying about looking for more work. And I’m sorry things aren’t working out. I wish I could go back to work as a skills trainer, but every time I think I’m doing good my mental health crashes again. You’re a real survivor. I agree with the others, I hope you catch a break soon!
The moment where you feel like giving up is quite often before something good happens. Ride out the storm, it’s worth it! (Not joking or making light of things, I’ve found this to be true more often than not.)