Sober since march last year. off meds

Hi y’all.

basically i had my little vaycay on here cuz i went off meds last year in march. i went off through consulting with my doc. He knows im off and doing well, i give him frequent updates.

Actually, im not proud to admit but since 14 i took advantage of my meds along with painkillers and had also an addiction to mixing them with large amounts of alcohol.

I feel bad about it sometimes, but it all happened after my folks got divorced and i had to move to my home country, which is Japan. Before i lived in the US in different parts around Maryland, so life just became all too different and i guess my schizy started showin from then.

By all means, please dont take this post as its like the most positive situation for me now because I quit meds. im not encouraging being off meds to be the ultimate road to success or recovery. actually for me it hasnt been lol.

its been a lot harder and i have been frequently exercising and trying to get out and socialize more. Actually im less closer with some friends cuz i guess ive been feeling more like i wanna be alone in my one independence, as before i had that but i felt like i need to be around my friends 24/7. not that i ditched them lol i just hang by myself now. especially outdoors or at the gym lol.

i feel calm but it might be cuz im in my junior year of college at age 22 about to be 23, and the adult age has been causing a lot of my feelings of new boredom. haha

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