Should you disclose your schizophrenia to a date?

I am disclosing it on my dating profile because last time I didn’t he didn’t talk to me anymore so I want to be upfront about it because as much as people say they understand me they don’t really when they see me ill

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No, unless you want to be a martyr.

The very thing you are acknowledging people will do, see you with prejudice, will crush you down. They don’t and won’t understand. It takes familiarity and compassion to change a belief. People don’t do it with announcements. People won’t trust you, especially if you are advertising it. That too is already breaking a social norm.

I talk of anytime someone wants to be honest, they need the three legs that support the table. Timing, tact, and appropriateness. If one is missing, don’t do it.

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I’d let someone get to know you a bit before you spring that on them. Almost no one actually knows what schizophrenia really is, and it varies wildly.

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No way. That’s private information that you shouldn’t share with strangers if you can help it. Sure, you wouldn’t get anyone who minds you having sz, but you may find that people who contact you may be doing so to take advantage of you.

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Putting your health history on a dating profile is weird. Don’t do it. Let it come up in conversation.

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@bluerose. So the guy was a jerk. And through online dating you’ll likely meet many more. But don’t let him make you change anything you’re doing. I wouldn’t announce that to total strangers. They might even meet up with you just to mess with you in regards to your sz. It could actually make you a target

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I wouldn’t disclose my schizophrenia to a date because the general population doesn’t even know what the condition is. People will understand the definition of mental illness but the word schizophrenia may scare them.

During my 5 months training, I didn’t reveal to any of my normal friends that I was schizophrenic. The less they know, the better.

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Sometimes they’ll ask a question about my history which will lead to me bringing the opportunity to say I’ve had issues with mental illness. I don’t tell em schizophrenia. I mean I asked a girl/Lady if I could tell her something’s about myself and she said yes. I told her the basic jist of some of my life. And I throw in like “you probably think I’m crazy or something”. And she was like “no I don’t think you’re crazy!!” And she emphathized with me a bit she was nice. But it didn’t work out but that’s how I’d approach it or something don’t put it in the profile. A lot of people mention if they have disabilities but there’s a lot of stigma attached to sz still I wouldn’t put it in your profile. That’s just me

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The only time I think it is appropriate to disclose that type of info is if it turns into a more serious relationship for example: 3 months in and you consider them a partner and have been emotionally intimate before, then I say go for it. But in the beginning days of the date no too early.

I’ve been doing the whole online dating thing, and I’ve been struggling to come up with a good time to tell a woman that I am sz. I haven’t got to that point yet, but I figure if I’m talking to a girl for a couple days/weeks, I should bring it up. Don’t want to waste their time if it’s a dealbreaker for them

I wouldn’t advertise my diagnosis on a dating profile.
The stigma associated with sz is great!

Plus @CoCo is right, you could be making yourself a target.

It’s too risky.

I would tell your date after you feel comfortable with the situation.

This could take weeks.

Good luck @bluerose!

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I wouldn’t put it in my profile, it might do more harm than good.

Wait until there’s a level of trust established, and it becomes relevant to the conversation.
Make sure they feel free to ask questions and have them answered truthfully.

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Just learn to keep it under control and you don’t have to mention it.
hulk-norton-eyes-hdrimg

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It’s not something I’d mention. I’d keep the DX with me to the grave if possible.

My thoughts exactly. You have to largely play it by ear.

I waited til the third date with Mr. Star. That gave him a chance to get to know me, and realize I wasn’t dangerous.

Please don’t put it on your profile. There are predators out there who seek out mentally ill girls to date because they are manipulative and abusive, and know that few people will believe a mentally ill girl who reports abuse. Seriously, you’ll only attract creeps by putting it in your profile.

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I wouldn’t do it simply because of the stigma of schizophrenia

When I was dating I was up front about it online while getting to know eachother…it usually came up when they asked why I don’t work…“disability”…what disabiliity? “mental illness”…what mental illness…" schizophrenia"…they usually appreciated me being honest.

You get to an age and everyone has some baggage. You wouldn’t be the only one withholding information for a while. Yes it pays to be honest and it’s the basis of any relationship but some things should be left till later. Schizophrenia is a biggie and it’s something I would keep close for a while till you get to know someone!

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I disclosed the substance abuse and MI issues a few weeks into the relationship. Got over that hurdle as we’re in the 20th year of being “a thing”.

:blush:

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