I’m 18 and my hopes and dreams are over. I’ve been hospitalized three times for suicidal behavior. What can I even be positive about? My mind is so shattered that I can barely read. I can’t do anything, I’ll never find a girl. Its humiliating because my Dad went to Yale and i had so much promise. spiritually i was very healthy b4 this. ive resorted to simply not caring about anything, as a coping mechanism because my future is so bleak. should i care.
Even on this site i feel everyone is persecuting me, even if they’re being nice and hlepful. i feel like there is nowhere to turn.
Sometimes it feels that there is this elimination game that involves taking things away you until you are at your most raw. Don’t be afraid of those emotions. It’s a part of our illness that once you are aware of them you gain a greater understanding.
It is hard enough going through adolescence when you don’t have sz. If you do it with sz I bet it is doubly hard. Try to find positive things about your life. Get into the simple pleasures. That’s what I do. Try not to succumb to the feeling that life is passing you by. I had that at your age, and it was painful. Don’t judge your insides by other people’s outsides. Find a hobby you enjoy.
These are not out of the ordinary for schiz and you are also only 18. Chance are you will see a massive amount of recovery in the next 10 / 15 years. Id say practically everyone with schiz has being where you are now.
People with mental health conditions will have to be diligent that things gain a new perspective after suffering through feelings of loneliness strangeness and strife. If you can’t count on this then the suffering never ends.