Have you ever started to see medications as punishment? That is a strong tendency of mine.
yes in a way…i only take them to keep my parents happy. personally i don’t think i need them at all…which is dangerous thinking but there u go.
Usually I just accept that they are something I need, but I have felt that way. Last week when I upped my Seroquel and had a bad reaction I was pleading with my mom as if she were God that I would promise to be good. The sedation really amped up my symptoms and I was terrified. It felt like I had committed some sin and was being punished. Sometimes I get angry that the treatment I get does so much harm. The meds have changed my body and the ECT causes so much anxiety. I’m noticing that recently my memory has been worse, which could be from the ECT. I have forgotten the stove was on and there are just more holes then usual. But I just remind myself that I would not be functioning without treatment. I would probably be in prison. Everybody has their cross to bear.
Meds are not a punishment. They are a necessity for recovery. Sure, they can have undesirable side effects, but they are meant to be of assistance.
so oftenyou here little words take your medicineoften its body struggling normal who has a bone to chewsure we could look at is it as a punishmentthat our society has pushed upon usdriven by ridiculous and abusebut I’d rather picture of more mellow worldone where we decided to take medicine rather than the alternative of living freely involved in our schizophrenia
Taking medications is no picnic, but what else can one do in this world to survive.
If i don’t take them they hurt me badly yet again.
I had to give up after the second time.
And now the meds are killing me as well.
I think in a way,after the punishment is over I will be free…but now I need to take it,hopefully I can recover
In my first psyche ward it was more like blackmail.
Me : “Do I HAVE to take them”?
Nurses : “If you don’t, we may have you leave”.
Me : “MAY”? Then I won’t take them".
Eventually they wore me down and I took some Stellazine. That’s why I can somewhat relate to lots of people on here about refusing medication.I felt it is what triggered me to change and become sick. But NOW I know I need them.
I do sometimes think I’m only taking them to keep society happy, I don’t function well off of them so I act weird and do bizarre things in public which scares people, but even on meds I’m weird, however it does feel like I have to take them to conform in society.
I remember when I first started on ap’s I gained weight rapidly and I didn’t want to take them; everyone just said to focus on getting my mental health better, that my physical problems could be resolved. I’m still fighting with pain and to get the weight off, the meds didn’t help because I don’t respond to atypicals. Wish I fought harder.
Though the majority of the time I take them because I want to be able to study, do art, talk properly etc. I do it because it stops me from getting suicidal and the voices or thoughts dictating my every move.
Even though I’m not very well right now, I still take my meds, and if I don’t perk up soon; I will ask for tweaking.
I still do think sometimes it’s just to keep people who have nothing to do with me happy.
I used to see them as punishment too. It was just what my parents wanted me to do so I wouldn’t embarrass them… so I would be “normal” and be molded into a pale imitation of everyone else.
But then it finally hit me… Take the meds and that equals… no hospital stay and I can function.
I don’t mean “be just like everyone else” I mean… I can talk, get to the washroom to pee because I remember how to get there. The wheel in my head that used to spin at the speed of light and had all my words would slow down on meds… and with the words not passing me by, I could talk.
NO meds? Then it’s three weeks tops and I am back in the hospital… and in that past, I’ve been in restraints. I don’t see my meds as punishment any more.