It’s been difficult. I ended up in a PHP (Partial Hospitalization Program) for my eating disorder and I’ve been hating it so far. This is the first time I’m receiving treatment for anorexia and it feels…odd. I’ve been attempting to recover for 6 years and I’m finally here but damn, it’s hard. Especially with my MDD. I feel like life’s not worth living anymore. I really have missed y’all. If it’s not too much to ask for, I really need some supportive words to keep going. I’m so close to quitting the program all together and relapse. But a tiny part of me wants to recover. I’m torn. 
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Don’t quit the program. Be a fighter. You’ve done a great job so far. 6 years is great going.
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I trust that you will be able to recover!
You are a strong, special, unique person.
You will manage(hopefully) to become healthy.
Life can sometimes be difficult.
It is important to have a healthy fighting spirit.
Your goal is to survive, and if possible regain your health and thrive.
I wish you luck in your quest.(to sunshine)
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I’m sorry you’re having a rough time, but remember that you’re actively helping yourself right now. Eating disorders can be deadly, so take any help you can get to recover. Two of my closest friends have struggled with eating disorders their whole lives. I’ve seen how terrifying it can get. But recovery is totally possible. It takes a lot of work, and you have to learn to face really unpleasant things without falling back on your most familiar coping method. But the longer you work at it, the easier it gets. You’re in the worst of it now. Both of my friends are now recovered, and they have learned all sorts of healthy ways to handle the stress in their lives now. You can do it, too.
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Hi Sunshine! You can do it! You’ve come this far. It might be really confronting but just keep your eye on the prize. Imagine how accomplished you’ll feel when it’s all over, and it will all be over soon.
Get to it!
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You have to give it a chance if it can help you deal with your anorexia problems. Anorexia maybe an issue that you have problems with for your whole life. However maybe this program can teach you ways of overcoming whatever it is that drives you not eat. I guess maybe this will tell you why you have the current problems that you do so you can eliminate them.
I don’t know if this works but when people are dieting they are told to eat a little less on their plate than they feel like eating. Maybe it works if you do the opposite and try to eat a little more than you feel like.
What is your favorite food?
Also best of luck.
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If I’ve learned anything about eating disorders, it’s that it doesn’t matter how long you’re sick or how deeply entrenched you are, you can recover!
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You deserve to be healthy! Hang in there through the tough times. You can do this. You have already come so far. good luck 
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You’ll get through, I promise. I was 7 stone 2, and I’m back to a normal size, it just takes time. Thoughts are with you.
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You can do it. You’re a good person, and you deserve to be free of anorexia. Things will get better.
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Hey @Sunshine, glad you are getting help and hope you can continue. This could be a crossroads for you and I hope you can see the road worth taking. Life can be hard at times, but it is worth facing our fears for a better life.
I know you can do this and we are all here to support you in whatever way we can
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@everhopeful
@Erez_Shmerling
@Mountainman
@crimby
@Tiredout
@Ninjastar
@anon84763962
@SP2342
@catchme
@47average
Thank you all so so much for the kind words. I will repeat these every morning! 
And @SP2342, my favorite food is French fries!
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