I really like my therapist only I think she is lying to me. it’s like I am being manipulated into something instead of discussing the issues honestly. this really bothers me.
I also feel like there are other problems but am afraid to confront her about it. what am I supposed to do – call her a liar?
I like her and don’t want to lose her.
judy
Why? What is she telling you that is dishonest? (Bearing in mind that sz and paranoid delusional bipolar do this to us because that’s what they do.)
Did you have any people on your family of origin you were forced to depend on who lied to you, invalidated your sense of reality, over-restricted you, over-limited you, etc?
What kind of therapy does she do with you?
I believe notmoses that some of the stuff I tell her has some truth to it and all she ever says is that it is my paranoid delusions acting up again and I should tell myself that.
it bothers me quite a bit, sorry.
judy
Our paranoid delusions almost always have a basis in actual facts, though what we do with the facts may get unreasonable. (At least, mine do.)
My actual facts have to do with the subtly crazy-making, adoptive parents I inherited after my natal ma left me with them. Adoptive Ma was icky-gooey lovey-dovey here and quite suddenly a raging maniac there. Adoptive Da was either unplugged or disgusted (not in the least because he wasn’t very happily married and he needed a safe target for his frustration).
I never trusted people for long, but when I was mis-dx’d and mis-medicated for several years by supposed “expert professionals,” what limited capacity to trust I had was almost totally wiped out for most of decade.
What are your actual facts?
my community is really and truly hostile to me.
this isn’t a delusional reality but a true one.
they seem to know I have MI and are quite quite nasty to me.
judy
What is MI? (Did I miss this?)
And are you on meds?
What are your thoughts? I promise I will not shrug them off.
I know,MI refers to mental illness…
I went to therapy today but was late for it,so it’s not so nice today.My therapist put in effort though
I am on meds notmoses. judy
I just don’t have luck with pdocs etc. my dad once went into debt to pay for an expensive pdoc for me and all o f a sudden I noticed in a few sessions that he didn’t give a d___ about me and why do this to my dad who was such a dearheart?
he took all our money and didn’t deliver the goods, so to speak. he must have hated me or something because they list him as one of the best in town in the newspapers.
then I had another pdoc who kept hitting me on the head so to speak with how I am diseased. I guess he thought it was his misfortune that I was his patient so he did that. he made me feel like a machine at best and like a derelict at worse.
my first pdoc spent our time together lecturing me about how much money he deserved for treating me only that’s all I got – no treatment. I guess we had to pay to see his beautiful face.
judy
I think that may be you need a crazy person to be your therapist . I am delusional enough and I won’t charge you anything. I think I start my own therapy sessions for free right her on this forum. Just imagine your therapist agreeing with all your crazy thoughts as if they didn’t really know the difference themselves so as to get you to think for yourself how you can help them instead. May be she really is a little crazy and just became a therapist so she might better get a grip on reality from seeing for herself first hand insane thinking in actuality trying to reason with itself.
I had a run of misfortune with pdocs from '94 to '02 and really suffered (badly enough to empty the contents of the med cab into my stomach twice). BUT… I finally found one who had her head screwed on who got me accurately dx’d and on the right med.
A lot of p-docs understand the physiology of paranoid psychoses but do not understand how to deal with paranoid pts that well because they don’t relate to all the frustrations we encountered, and the actual (good) reasons why we become distrustful.
Can I ask 1) what meds you’ve been on in the past, and 2) what meds you’re on now?
It’s frustrating sometimes when doctors don’t quite listen to us. Especially pdocs, a few of mine haven’t listened to me and usually if i feel they aren’t listening to me i stop going to them and switch doctors.
Sometimes (and I love both my therapists), I just confront them even though its kind of scary and awkward, but they always respond very well and don’t take offense. I think you should take a shot and speak your mind.
Much easier with therapists who are trained for this (because they understand why sz pts are distrustful) than with docs who (until pretty recently) mostly aren’t (and don’t).
I’ve been around this rodeo long enough to know that the MD cult-ure is 1) waaaaaaaaaay over-stressed, and 2) using all manner of functional and not-so-functional defense mechanisms – including delusions of grandeur – to deal with that stress.
I’ve had much better luck discussing touchy issues with nurse practitioners and physicians’ assistants than with MDs, by and large.