So I was diagnosed with schizophrenia in 2009 and was on antidepressants for about 9-10 years. I really had a hard time because I had really good support with my family until my mom died. Being diagnosed and trying to continue your life on meds has been one crazy journey. I wound up in some pretty unusual relationships and was very much broken. Ever since I had a few big life changes I have been holding on… I realize I was able to almost make some good decisions but my mind just wasnt strong enough to fight the things I probably wasnt a fan of. I am now pregnant and I have a had a really rough almost two years of marriage. Lets just say my symptoms kicked in like no tomorrow. Everything seems big and powerful and I feel powerless. I also notice that when I was on meds I could do what I wanted. I have tried since to be responsible for my health and well being. The hardest part is acknowleding my achievements. Since I have been off meds I am told I am doing great but the rush of the voices which are probably memories or hallucinations becomes too much especially since my mom and dad are not here. I have also faced a lot of changes and I realize I should take things slow. I just wish this could be easier in some way or that I could focus better so this would take over much of my brain space.
Some days it feels like everyone I know or knew played a bad person on my life. I am trying to move on now. Just looking to continue my coping skills from all of my therapy sessions.
You should ask your dr what to do and follow that plan. Meds are a necessity for people with sz. Can you get other sources of support from your county’s mental health? It sounds like you need to reach out for support.
I’ve been through five pregnancies and stayed on my meds. I was just considered high risk and saw a specialist for each pregnancy. My babies have turned out great. They are all older now and don’t have any mental or physical ailments. My psychiatrist tried me off my meds and it didn’t go well. They decided my mental health was important. Probably some people will disagree with me, but my babies did not suffer because of it. I think that the medical field is overly cautious because there are chances of problems, but usually you see that when you are on extremely high dosages. At least that’s what the high risk doctors told me. I just made sure I didn’t breastfeed my babies.
I thought of doing yoga since I am zumba certified. But pregnant and living with my sister while my husband is deployed is bit of a challenge on it’s own. Maybe a groupon for a local yoga class for pregnant women?
To add on to this I would just like to say I may have mentioned this was really stressful.
Today I am feeling a bit better but I forgot to mention all of the things I have done.
So my mom passed away in 2013. I got my first real corporate job out in Texas after working small positions in New York while in college. I was an accounting major but i finally graduated with a finance major. My mom was diagnosed with Cancer eventually and I had already been in and out of the hospital including CBT. One fine day ! …lol…I decided maybe I should try to meet some one …like get a boyfriend. My friend hooked me up with this guy who was so cool. That didn’t work and so I though being Pakistani and all I could get married and find another way to meet someone and make it kosher. LOL. Lets just say this was the most horrific time of my life (I married him and got divorce 2 years later - total ■■■■■■■, hidden druggie and extremely annoying and cheap family). I had lost two children (not fully formed) through this relationship and it was a monster ride. My bro and cousins thought eventually that my mom and myself could fly to TX, for her treatment since as it is I got the divorce and we had family there maybe things would be easier. I think being on medications and remembering some good sneaker stores and spanish music like going to the gym for zumba really helped. A apart of me just became ready for war, like channeling your inner woman feeling and how you would respond to the loss of a child. So I did really good in my job in TX got promoted made up to 50,000/yr and still remember my mom and her healthy ways - at least I try. I met new faces made cool friends, went to galas with my cousin volunteering there too, volunteered at a food shelter for the homeless - scariest ting to ever see in person, got a gym membership for a super cool place and danced to zumba music three days a week - a bit of a challenge, starting out slow and now I am certified as an instructor. I also eventually moved on to other places for work and on the side I am now a Certified International Makeup Artist, you can find me on IG as Pink_Lush_Diamond. I love pictures, shopping and taking pictures of merchandise, going to the movies - I hit up every movie in 2016 with my new husband who I love and am so grateful for because he was the best thing that ever happened to me. We have traveled a little, gone to mountain tops, bike rides, zoos and done some other stuff too! I have tried to stay very positive and I even studied for an SAP exam which makes you crazy money. I also plan to launch my beauty store website in 2019 or 2020. So I found a good psychiatrist were getting used to each other and he is helping me with my OBGYN to deliver and make things easier.
SAP SE is a German-based European multinational software corporation that makes enterprise software to manage business operations and customer relations. SAP is headquartered in Walldorf, Baden-Württemberg, Germany with regional offices in 180 countries. The company has over 335,000 customers in over 180 countries.
I am waiting to deliver in 2 weeks and I am not breast feeding thank God. I also believe no matter what in our time our diets and groceries suck. Everything is unhealthy apparently. The pressure to workout and be fit especially when your schizophrenic is horrible. I have some crazy symptoms and I am newly married the combination of the two make you wanna tear your hair. The other thing is I am a military spouse with a lot on my hands and I’m 32 having my first baby. It feels like the most longest thing I waited for but I dont care now I am almost praying I will just have one child without any pressure of thinking to go through this burden again :/. I just know this is really all I have.
I realize I was able to almost make some good decisions but my mind just wasnt strong enough to fight the things I probably wasnt a fan of. I am now pregnant and I have a had a really rough almost two years of marriage. Lets just say my symptoms kicked in like no tomorrow. Everything seems big and powerful and I feel powerless. I also notice that when I was on meds I could do what I wanted. I have tried since to be responsible for my health and well being. The hardest part is acknowleding my achievements. Since I have been off meds I am told I am doing great but the rush of the voices which are probably memories or hallucinations becomes too much especially since my mom and dad are not here. I have also faced a lot of changes and I realize I should take things slow. I just wish this could be easier in some way or that I could focus better so this would take over much of my brain space.