Perhaps it’s just a America thing, but as a child you are taught that you need to know exactly what you want and need to do for the rest of your life immediately when you graduate from high school. I honestly think this is wrong. Sure, there’s those people that know exactly what they want to do and what they’re passionate about that would make them money, but most people are not like that and it takes people quite a bit of time to figure out what they truly want out of life.
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Yep my dad was an a hole about that
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Don’t you think that’s true though? Time is short.
I agree it’s not nice .
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I’m trying not to pressure my daughter, but I have asked her a few times if she has a particular interest, and I’ve gone over options for majors with her. I hope she doesn’t feel pressured. Heck, I still question if I’ve chosen the right major, and I’m 40 and have done this before!
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I don’t think asking someone what their interests are is pressuring them but If I was personally not sure about college I wouldn’t go at all because college is quite expensive to be messing around with, so I would at least be doing something else until I decide what I want.
You are 100% right about it being expensive. My community college costs more than my daughter can get in loans for an undergrad dependent student. With four years of school, though, her loans should be right around $20k, which isn’t bad, all things considered.
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its odd people expect everyone to have a goal without informing on how to make a plan, being expected to figure everything out alone is tough but most of the older ppl feel thats what they had to do. not talking about my own parents but things ive noticed
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I let my Daughter do what she wants when shes with me. Shes Autistic, so even a car alarm will stress her out - and she reaches for the headphones.
I don’t pressure her at all. Im very careful when taking her out, we have left a restaurant before now, cos she could not cope with it.
Quite often she lies on my bed - and ive got mood lighting as well - so she can chill out.
She absolutely hates loud noise or shouting - it freaks the poor girl out.
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I have to admit, I always felt that education was critical because when I grew up, I was made aware that if my parents had finished school, my mom (single parent), at least, would be doing much better financially. I saw a big difference in the way my friends with educated parents lived as opposed to how I and others in families with minimum wage jobs lived. No one pressured me, though. I literally got my GED, then walked into a local college, signed up, and started a couple of weeks later.
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When I was growing up it was quite mixed for me, of course the families who parents were doctors and lawyers we’re doing pretty well for theirselves but others who had Masters in other areas weren’t doing well due to the job market of their particular field being oversaturated then you have the skilled trade people who make a decent amount of money, but their body were taking a beating over time of doing it.
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This reminds me of the time when I was in high school and it was career day, some insurance guy came and said you can make a whole bunch of money with just high school diploma working as a insurance agent.
Edit: he was the only one I remembered on career day because he had a really good sales pitch.
I never felt pressured by my family, but i pressured myself to do well academically since 4th grade. When i started going in mental hospitals as a teenager, tho, all future expectations from my family went way down. My grandma even spent my college fund cuz nobody thought I’d ever go to school again. Eventually, tho, i went back and got my bachelor’s and masters degree, but i got my loans dismissed cuz the govt considers me totally and permanently disabled. Nowadays I’m happy when i go to my day program every day…very few expectations now.
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I wonder if this works for medical debt?
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My parents were the opposite of so called ‘tiger parents’. The type of parents who throw a hissy fit if their child fails to come 1st in every class. My parents were very indifferent when my academic performance nose dived around the age of 9.5. It’s hard to tell which is worst ‘tiger parents’ or parents like mine were.
It should’ve been a red flag to investigate what was going on, as my intelligence level was significantly above my academic performance. Executive functioning becomes increasingly important when it comes to how well a person does academically.
It being a better indicator of academic performance than IQ in school age children. Mine wasn’t,and still isn’t, good.
He was correct. I am doing very well in insurance these days.
We had the expectation our daughter would do well academically at school and earn a degree at university on graduation. She did. She credits our pushing her in things like 4H public speaking and archery competition for the confidence and skills she has today. She graduated with honours and came out of uni straight into a job she loves related to her degree where she is making bank.
I would do this all over again.
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When I finished high school I went to an organization which specialized in guiding students to the right majors. The conclusion of all our conversations and questionnaires was that I was best suited for Economics and Political Sciences. I chose the former but also finished the first year of political science in combination.
My mom just has a High School Degree but took over a Driving School from her mother and has done well financially.
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If I didn’t rebel I would have wasted time going to college.
I got into art and technology instead and worked for 20 years
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My mom held pretty high academic standards for me. As a teacher, she’s seen tons of kids do well, and lots of others fizzle and drop out.
I wasn’t the most self-driven student— everything (except math) came relatively easy to me, and I kinda had a lackadaisical approach to schoolwork. I would much rather do other stuff besides study— which I think is a normal teenaged response.
I resented my mom’s attitude during high school, and we clashed a lot during those days— but realize now that she only wanted the best for me and knew that she needed to be a pushy parent to get me off my ass.
Ended up graduating high school with some AP classes under my belt, decent GPA and ACT scores, and attending (and ultimately graduating from) university.
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My parents weren’t pushy with me, but they were with my elder sibling. That rubbed off and made me realise young that academics were important for those who are not lucky enough to have wealthier/secure parents - i still believe this to this day
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I honestly wasn’t aware of these type of programs exist. When I finish high school I got a job instead of going to college immediately. I did eventually go to college I just wanted to make sure I know what I wanted to do but my mother was so disappointed, she told me I was just going to be a minimum wage loser for the rest of my life.
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