Painting My Way Through Mental Illness

Thanks for the good wishes. I enjoyed the fact that you have taken the hassle to write back. I appreciate. Books are indeed good friends. I lost my job too. I used to work as a journalist in the UK before moving to Turkey to find out that the rules in the UK for journalism won’t work back in Turkey. Currently I am translating books in English into Turkish. Money is small but it’s better than nothing. I find it very difficult to every day sit at my desk and do the translation. I tend to blame the medication. My pdoc warned that once I am on medication it will cause a depression for the fact that I would be out of my psyhcosis. Psyhcosis kept me on going I guess, and now being out of it I find it difficult to replace it with a productive way of being. Mindfulness practice helped me a lot. I have read a couple of books on mindfulness by Jon Kabat-Zinn. It worked like a miracle for me. Now I only have to concentrate on my breathing to escape from thoughts that are occasionally self- defeating. I wish things were different for me. But, that’s life as it continues to teach me lessons.

i’ve practised mindfulness for 10 years & also found it a great help. It’s physical feelings in my torso/chest i have trouble with - i get a lot of anxiety/fear in my chest & bad feelings. i don’t know exactly what it is, nor how to resolve it?

Same for me that i wish things were different - such is life.

Love the art work, I can see picaso’esque type style, cubism et al.

I also have drug induced psychosis - turned into Schizoaffective as I have mood disorders with my delusions (previously). But thats it, they were only delusions, did not hallucinate, did not hear voices, did not suffer from other symptoms of schizophrenia, but they slapped me that label.

What I wanted to say is that I can identify with some of the work - it feels (for me anyway) that its an attempt at re-integration of the alters in your mind. Alters or sub-personalities are what surfaces to the forefront based on emotional states of mind, like you may feel angry, and have the anger persona, or happy, and be happy go lucky - get what I mean.

I feel for me this is a representation of putting chaos into order, to find re-integration of these alters into one overall personality. I really enjoy what I go out of them, but again, thats my take…can you explain what you were creating?? What does it mean for you - as usually the artist conveys a different message that the viewer interprets… once again well done and keep up the good work, I’ll upload my digital art in a moment…

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Love this one the most… Feels ‘integrated’… well done :smiley:

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Same Painting Different Sides