ON MENTAL ILLNESS: Thirty-Two Years on Antipsychotic Medications

"Antipsychotic medications haven’t made my intellect inoperative. I haven’t become impaired from them. I am able to feel pain and to cry, and I am able to enjoy certain things. My mind is nimble enough to where I am not verbally outmaneuvered by most psychotherapists unless I allow it.

I function on a lot of levels. Because I have practiced a lot of mindfulness, I am partly able to observe myself in a more aware perspective. I have studied meditation and have used this as a tool to deal with residual symptoms, medication side effects, and the difficulties of life.

I believe the brain isn’t the sole seat of thought. People and other creatures have something that goes deeper than the firings of neurons, the operation of gray matter. Many people seem to believe that the human mind is no more than a super-powered computer. A computer doesn’t have the ability to be self-aware. People and certainly other creatures have available to us a deeper level of thought.

The above-mentioned concept has allowed me to get more use of my imperfect brain than I would get otherwise. The extra perspective that I have accessed gives me the ability to make maps of the workings of my mind, it often allows me to focus my mind, as though focusing a lens; and it allows me to take my foibles and difficulties less seriously than I otherwise would.

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So, the upshot is that whenever things are difficult it’s sub-personal neurochemistry, but when we accomplish things it is due to personal effort. I’m glad the guy is doing well, whatever works…

i think there is a deeper level of thought also and i am able to connect with this through going to services and prayer meetings, take care

For me, that is true of Geodon and Seroquel. All the typical ap’s killed my imagination dead. I felt too bad to think.

It seems like what they were trying to get at, isn’t that everything good = effort vs everything bad = brain problem.

But rather it seems like the intended message is to remember that we are not our brain organ anymore than we are our kidneys or our liver. These are all just organs that we have, and the can all get sick or malfunction.

And then furthermore that the way they came to terms with taking medication, is that it helps their brain organ function better, making it a better tool for them to use.

I can definitely understand how plenty of people would respond like, “Well good for you, not how it works for me,” because not everyone has fabulous results with medication, whereas it sounds like the writer did have great results.

But I think their intentions are good. Basically, “This worked for me, so I want other people to try it in case it works for them. So I’ll try to persuade other people to try it.” Good intentions, even if they might be missing the factor that not everyone has great results with meds, or how some people have to go through 20 awful pdocs and meds that don’t work before finding their magic cocktail (and it’s very hard not to give up along the way).

So yeah, the presentation could be a bit obnoxious and too idealistic for some people. But I do agree with their perspective that we are not just our brain organ, and that it can help to remember that.

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Zyprexa made me feel dumb. And fat. And oh, so very, VERY hungry.

I love Geodon.




Zyprexa made me feel dumb too. It also made me sleep a lot and crave sugar. I was in a mild depression the whole time I was on it.

It made me crave everything. I’m amazed I didn’t wind up eating sawdust as everything else wound up going into my piehole. Also? Being the size of an aircraft carrier is depressing!


For me it all depended on the dose of Zyprexa. 10 mgs made me feel really dozy which was not good for looking after a wife with dementia. It reduced the war zone in my head and helped me be less stressed in my role as a carer but the downside was the doziness/ lack of awareness. 2.5mgs few side effects but little therapeutic value. 5mgs got the balance about right when I remembered to take it.
Didn’t notice much weight gain on it maybe because I wasn’t taking it regularly.

If it had not been for the doziness 10 mgs might have been an ideal dose in that it gave me a great deal of inner calm.

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