For the first time in ages after having an argument with hubby’s just now. Six cuts on my arm. What the f*** was I thinking??? What will hubby say if he finds out? Will he want a divorce? I’m terrified of him finding out. Oh God I was so stupid! Why did I get driven to it again? Waaaaaaaaa! 
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Sometimes stress pushes us to make bad choices. It sounds like you already know what you did wasn’t the best choice. Hopefully he will be understanding that you were reacting out of a place of instability. Was he aware of your self mutilation in the past? Please take the time to clean and dress the wounds so they don’t get infected. And try not to panic and make the situation worse. Are you feeling better now? I’m sorry you’re dealing with all of this.
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Thank you Leaf. Yes he does know about my past cutting and once made me promise not to again. But I did once or twice after that. I feel so ashamed of myself! I don’t want him to know but it’s so hard to hide cuts from him bcuz what if he wants sex and I have to undress? I feel so terribly ashamed!
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I know what you mean I did too this week and I cried so hard. I feel dumb but better. I do not need to do it again. What is it that you really need? Sometimes it’s just to cuddle and have your hubby so you are ok. A good hug helps too and maybe you need some sleep who knows. I am sure he understands but probably is scared for you and does not know what to do. I am sure if your married he does not want to lose you. Reassure him that you are not gonna die or leave him. You were just sick.
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you slipped up, please don’t beat yourself up, that’s not helpful. You need love and understanding right now. Be a friend to yourself now when you need it the most. Give yourself the love and respect that you would give any other person.
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All I want is for hubby to hold me and say everything will be OK and that he’s sorry for being so hard on me in our argument. But he hardly ever gives me hugs or kisses. And he knows I’m so needy of physical touch. I feel so spent looking after him and doing things for him and receive so little in return. I touch him a lot but he hardly ever touches me unless it’s sex. I feel so heartsore and this petty argument pushed me over the edge and I feel all my grievances all at once.
He’s a good man but I’m so f***ing needy!
It’s understandable that he doesn’t want you to hurt yourself, but we don’t hurt ourselves without reason. You were driven to a stress point that triggers that reaction in you. Please create other avenues for stress relief, @Hadeda.
I’m so sorry that happened, but please don’t add to the self harm by feeling so guilty about it. You did something wrong, yes, but the punishment is in the action… I hope your husband is understanding and that you two can find a solution together that will help you to not take that route in the future. 
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I’m sorry I spoke bad about my husband. We made it up and I told him about my cutting and it was so hard but he understands. He’s such a good man! Feel a bit better now. Thanks for your support!
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Good luck to you
I’m sorry that you hurt yourself. Try and do something extra nice for you (a nice meal or activity you enjoy) and try not to beat yourself up over it.
Yesterday I had a hard time too and I relapsed and cut myself again. It’s been a struggle for me for quite a few years, but I was doing good and some time had past since the last incident.
What I’m trying to do now is forgive myself for slipping up and trying not to feel bad that I went all that time without cutting then messed up and did it again. I’m just gunna go one day at a time, and try not to feel guilty and ashamed about it.
Do you have any coping strategies when it comes to self harm? I would recommend drawing on your wrist with marker, or maybe hold an ice cube. Once I covered my wrists in temporary hello kitty tattoos so I wouldn’t ruin them by hurting myself.
Stay strong 
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My understanding of self harm is that when you have been hurt to the point of going numb, even pain feels good. My self harm came from social failure and a sadistic father. It’s been a long time since I did anything like that. Occasionally, I’ll pull a hangnail.
Thank you for removing that unkind horrible post. I read it on email and was shocked. I know my husband well and he’s not bad. How dare that woman write such sh*t!
Thanks again for your kindness. I only wrote what I did bcuz I was upset.
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