Sorry that happened to you…
Not sure what to say.
Even at 18 and I dated a 29 year old, he was probably too old for me…… it’s weird to think about. Then again at 19 I dated a guy who was 26, who seemed to have taken advantage of me.
But nothing like being 16 and dating a 23 year old.
I hope you can move past it. Totally creepy about the 13 and 7 year old! 
16 is the age of consent many places. What age does puberty and adolescence finish.
Whats conflicting is yes he definitely abused his position and abused me but he also opened up workds for me that otherwise i wouldnt have known i loved. Like spirituality, philosophy, tennis, recording. All things i still love.
So we just gonna ignore the constant cheating and spying on a 7 year old and going after a 13 year old?
No absolutely not!
I was in a very abusive relationship for a couple years with an older woman when I was 16-18 years old. Even though she was only two and a half years older, she had a massive power hold over me due to the nature of how we met, and she was an expert manipulator. I’m saying this because I can’t imagine how much harder that would be to cope with when there is an even bigger age gap.
I’m sorry you have to deal with this. I had conflicting feelings for a long time, but learned to compartmentalize my feelings and realized there was nothing healthy about what I went through. From my personal experience, even the “good times” were laced with an abusive overtone.
Also yes 16 is age of consent but there still can only be a certain gap in age until 18 abd im pretty sure he was on the border of it.
@Squanchy I know about manipulators. I still have one in my life and he still draws me into his life by saying he has skin cancer and I don’t care about him.
But like? Still disgusting. Why would a man whos about to graduate college want to be with a girl who has 2 more years of high school left
Heres the awful truth: People can be completely vile and still have good qualities. It could be he did all these good things just to groom you as @LilyoftheValley said or its possible that he truly cared about you despite being a pedophile and serial cheater.
That’s the truth of the world.
Obviously, I am in no way defending him or his actions. and I think you should absolutely avoid him. I think he’s a disgusting person. But disgusting people can still care about others. So, its hard to know his motives in talking you into college. Teaching you things and such.
I can’t believe I’m offering any kind of humanity to someone so disgusting, but the truth is, sometimes things aren’t black and white. This is probably why you’re confused. I can’t say with absolute certainty whether he was grooming or trying to help with his good actions.
I’m from the UK so don’t know the difference between school and collage, if you can explain the ages @Moon ?
Thats just something that gets to me sometimes. I dont twnd to see ppl in black and white but when someone does significant harm to me its definitely harder to acknowledge their good. Like my mom, she can truly be awful to ppl, and has been to me, but i am torn because i see a lot of good in her too.
High school typically ends at 18 and lots of people go straight into college and graduate at 22ish. He was a little behind in his studies though and graduated at 24.
I don’t think there is a limit on age gap in my state. I think most people frown on dating a 16 year old though.
Each state is different, and yes it SHOULD be frowned upon. Its not a healthy dynamic by any means.
UK and American dating ages are different. UK it is 16, some States it’s 18. That why’s it’s confusing.
Regardless of whats legal and whats not (not the topic at hand), its clear hes chronically into minors and his behavior towards me was negative.
I am not suggesting that this guy is good and you should look for the good in him. I’m just saying, even someone that vile can care about certain people. Al Capone may have cared about his son. Maybe Hitler loved his wife. This in no way makes these people good people. I’m just saying people can care about people and still be horrible.
I think seeing the good in others has led me into some bad situations… like with my ex, looking back i complained about her bwhavior so so much to my friend, yet i still clung to her good and ignored the bad until it was quite literally screaming in my face.
Different ex than the one ive been talking about here
@Moon There is no problem being vulnerable.