I miss my delusions. I miss my voices. Some of it anyway. Real life is kind of a drag. I feel like Im floating through life, like Im someone else. How can everyone be happy with the daily routines of life, cleaning and cooking and kids activities. Theres no escape from this.
I was someone else and now Im an average, middleaged mother withan office job.
Do you think your depressed kinda sounds like it, do you take any antidepressants. Or are you saying you miss the excitement of an episode
I miss some of my illness too. But as it nearly killed me I’m quite ok with things being boring.
Yeah, Im on Wellbutrin 150 mg. Maybe its not a high enough dose.
Hi I understand your feelings but you should be happy you are functioning… don’t just jam more pills down your throat to compensate for depression… try to excercise and not drink too much maybe try a hobby
When I get depressed that’s how I feel. And I have no energy to exercise to get more energy. My antidepressants have no side effects. I have learned it’s way easier to take a good dosage of antidepressants. Instead of struggling. I have enough trouble taking an antiphycotic that has side effects. I am high functioning and a lot of it due to antidepressants, the fact I’m not constantly fighting to not be depressed. I can’t do a lot more than my 40 hrs a week without getting stiff joints . So I had to give up running. Depression is nothing to mess around with as they have a higher suicidal rate than sz.
Youre right. I should be thrilled I am functioning. I dont know what more I expect from life.
Life gets boring for everybody. You work to pay the bills and fulfill your responsibilities and that gives you the right to have a little fun. If you’re in a rut of being bored, maybe go out to dinner once a week. I understand when you say you miss your delusions, I understand the concept but personally, I don’t miss my delusions at all. But I understand the concept.
My feelings are completely irrational. Really, Im spoiled. I go out to eat all the time. Granted, I dont do much else when it comes to activities.
Yeah, my doc seems to think Im depressed. I get these waves where I feel good but they dont always last very long.
Sure, I understand. Delusions are thrilling. But notice your kids where everything is new and you might find the mundane a little more exciting or at least interesting.
So true. My one year old is really picking up words, my three year old is constantly saying new things, and my five year old is always wanting to tell me and show me new things shes learned.
when I used to get high when I was younger it was as if someone had taken the auditory hallucination volume knob and cranked up to the maximum volume
I love kids, but 3 small babies at home is quite the challenge. Hope you can escape a bit of that reality to keep yourself alive in spirit.
Don’t forget your babies depend on you to be there for them. You have to care for yourself to be able to care for them.