I just read an article I think it was posted on this forum that anyone gets psychotic when home alone. Since I was home alone when I had my first psychotic episodes, I’m finding great relief discovering the study that says it’s a normal reaction. That it’s normal to be psychotic under the circumstances.
If you mean the Onion article I linked, it was a satirical piece just poking fun at silly things people tend to do when they are by themselves. I linked it in humor, because I tend to get a lot worse when I have to be alone for several days to weeks at a time.
But it makes sense. Maybe, when we’re alone, our baby brain looks around and hears mother saying don’t do this don’t do that until we can’t think of anything to do. You might right down a schedule for yourself to keep your mind in order.
Well speaking just for myself, I think it’s because I have little to no stimulation or structure to help keep me grounded. I am just isolated all day every day in my mother’s house. The most I might get out is to take a walk now and then if the weather is nice, but taking walks feels impossibly terrifying and/or exhausting when I’m not doing well to start. My only social interaction is the brief interactions with my mother or her husband when they are home, which I think makes me that much more dependent on them in an unhealthy way. When they are gone for business or vacations, I won’t even have that anymore. So I think it’s often a combination of struggling with symptoms, while also not being in a healthy environment or lifestyle. Gets compounded.
I was the youngest and when I was the only child left at home, I was so used to my sister doing my talking for me that I hardly spoke at all to my parents my last two years in high school. It describes your present situation. I went on to college - something I wasn’t really ready for in the people sense of the word but I knew no alternative. I just wasn’t growing at home.
If you talk to self aloud you don’t hear it, but you also don’t have the voices stop. You can ask why you are hearing it all the time if you want. Would not do anything weird if voices tell you to as is just a bad joke. I work on computer at home lots of times and it’s starting to get quieter now. I’ve heard it for 12 years non-stop after selective amnesia attack of PTSD flashback and bad mental care after insomnia attack.
Being home alone is one of the rare times I get to kick back and really be myself, not that I’m ‘not myself’ when out and about with others, well, in most cases. As long as I’m alone in my home though, being alone in my parents house is like everything I look at either makes me sad because it reminded me of when everything was normal or it reminds me of sheer horror living among monsters during the worst winter on record.