Romantic love only appreciates the body.True love appreciates the mind and the humanity of others.
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Good cosmos, no. Not a hoax. I believe in love 
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I dont love myself much but i do love and feel loved despite the paranoiaā¦it seems like this is a sz thing or an effect ofā¦
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Iām sorry, @martinhersey1. My dad is 75 and even though he has his kids, thatās not every day. Thereās a lot of unhappiness that comes with aging. I hope you donāt think Iām silly, and of ofcourse itās not the same, but my dad has a cat whom he loves dearly and sheās brought life and companionship to his lifeā¦ In a few weeks he has to move to an assisted living place and heās not happy about that, but weāre hoping heāll find friends there. Are there any coffee shops near you? Where I live, the bakery and the coffe shop are hangouts for some of the retired folks. 
ļø
So sweet @Minnii! Thank you. We do understand each other, all of us on here. I wish I was easier to loveā¦ Iām a terrible companion in many ways.
I agreeā¦and thank you. I feel like a foreigner in my own homeā¦ Itās not my husbandās fault. Iām not at all easy to live with and not easy to understand. I donāt think heāll divorce me, even though I seem to dare him to regularly.
Thereās a line from a song, it goes something like this :
This is love,
This is pain disguised as a dream.
And thatās been my experience with it.
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I think itās hard to love a schizophrenic. Itās hard to trust intimacy as a schizophrenic.
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Itās not the old age at all. I enjoy life much more now that I am free of almost all responsibilities. Iāve had cats. I didnāt much like them, but I took care of them. Thanks for the sympathy. My problems are more existential than anything else.
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Iām sorry you are feeling this way. It could be the sz.
We love you here 
. I always love your thoughtful comments and ideas.
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Thank you! I donāt know why I have felt this way since childhood. I wondered if itās a sz thing. But there certainly could be other reasons. I really need to find a new therapist. ļø
Do you think it has something to do with childhood memories?
My mother often will believe no one cares for her as a result of what she when through as a young kid. [quote=āHedgehog, post:31, topic:48182ā]
I really need to find a new therapist.
[/quote]
I say go for it if the current isnāt working
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(ducking in and ducking out - consider this, @Hedgehog. It seems your sister might have drawn similar conclusions. It doesnāt need to be the truth - my mom loved me very much, but I didnāt really feel it - for it to have colored your perception of yourself as unloved, therefore (possibly?) unworthy of love.)
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Well, I would guess that it has something to do with my best friendās dad sexually molesting me during my first and part of second grade year. I donāt remember, but Iām guessing that I thought everyone knew and didnāt care. But for the idea to persist to this day as a core belief is surprising, frustrating, and regularly heartbreaking to meā¦Thank you @Rhubot and @Sharp 
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I was 6 7 or 8 and she was 23 or soā¦she was very atrractive one of my cousins girlfreind. She must have caught me looking so she started up stairs asking if im comingā¦im after 5 before 9 so i follow slowly my young mind racedā¦i found her on a bed no clothes and a look of lustā¦i learned alot but i was too youngā¦couple people saw us go up no one said nothingā¦