Need help with my son

Well I witnessed a full on teenage blowout yesterday. Sam got suspended from school for calling his teacher a ■■■■■. He’s refusing to do his homework. Told his teacher he was tired of getting zeros on his homework and told her F you. Told his stepmom he hated her and that she was a nut. Sam got grounded but Kris let Sam play on his phone she said “to keep Sam out of her hair”. Stepmom told Kris to take the phone away and he did.

He was giving Marlene dirty looks almost not paying me any mind. They were arguing back & forth.

My dad was here when I talked to him. He played Sam a song which made him smile but after that he went back to yelling at stepmom

I figure Sam will be alright with a lot of therapy.

The cops have been to their house more than once and cps has been called at least 4 times.

He’s been diagnosed as Autistic, ODD and ADHD. And has been diagnosed as a pathological liar also.

Stepmom said he’s been hanging around some bad kids at school and since then his behavior has gotten worse.

I suggested military school. It’s expensive though and we’d have to pull our money together

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Do you think something is going on in his life that needs attention? Could something be triggering this behavior

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My baby brother would come home drunk and ready to be loud. Every time he would raise his voice, my Mom would lower hers until she was whispering, and he was yelling. Finally, it would sink into him, and he would regulate his behavior.

I was there.

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His stepmom has a really bad temper and he’s 12 going on 13 in December. Once I called him up and I could hear her screaming at the top of her lungs at my ex husband telling him to “just get the ■■■■ out of my room!”

She was trying to give him instructions and my ex wasn’t doing something to her standards and she yelled at him.

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He doesn’t deserve military school if that’s his home life. The poor kid is not able to deal with that level of stress

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She’s tall and weighs 400 pounds. Sam is just a little guy. Because of my illness I can’t take him so I think if we find a good place maybe a program for troubled teens. He is a sweet smart kid.

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You have any brothers or sisters or any adult who give him attention? Do things with him?

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Does he have some positive role models in his life?

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My dad is going to call a lawyer tomorrow about grandpa’s rights which apply in my state. My dad is very worried about Sam. He may try to call Sam’s other grandfather who is also concerned.

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Don’t send your son to military school. I really don’t think it’ll help him emotionally.
There must be a reason he is lashing out at others. Maybe he feels insecure and upset about something?

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His stepmom is a tyrant and there’s nothing I can do about it.

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Wow, this is definitely a tough one. I wouldn’t send him to military school though. If I understand military school correctly I think they’re meant to prepare kids for life in the military. And he wouldn’t be able to enlist with all those diagnosis.’

Just try and talk to him. It sounds like something is really bothering him and he doesn’t know how to express himself in a positive way.

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I feel like your son is lacking stability and feels like he is unloved and is replicating the aggression that he sees in his step Mum. He’s lashing out at others when he feels threatened because he is used to being treated like that.

The real solution needs to be that the step mum needs to learn to communicate more effectively without shouting/swearing or being aggressive and learn how to give the son stability and love. But communicating that to his step mum will be a suicide mission lol.

Just my armchair opinion - not trying to judge your son. Im sure he has good qualities too and I definitely don’t blame him for his behaviour. Sounds tough for him.

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I agree with you. My ex husband is doing ■■■■ all. I wish he’d grow some balls and divorce her. She can be nice and I know she loves Sam but she just is screwing up. They both need parenting class.

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