Mumbling - one of our ways

Speaking up but in an ineffective way as if only talking to our self. Afraid our words might bite someone’s head off.

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People are all estranged to each other… most of them you won’t ever see again. They feel the same anyways that’s why everyone is so tight lipped. Normies don’t even have a chance to not give a ■■■■… and they even further from accepting their internal insanity.

I use to have this problem not anymore though, sometimes I snap into it without realizing but other times i’m alright. It pretty much got to a state of less giving a F and more just enjoying life. Life’s to short to be scared you’re offending someone with words unless you’re inteintally offending someone in a racist or offensive way, but if you are just talking and someone doesn’t like it so be it. Many people hate a lot of things people say and I see on a regular basis people saying a lot of dumb f crap that I just look the other way, because I realize at one point I was so in my head that I could barely even get words out because i was fearful of what I might say, or perceive inside my head during auditory hallucinations and delusions that I pretty much became a shut in and started mumbling, when i started to I call it “sober” up to reality again after coming out the other end of my diagnosis I realized people say far more offensive things and there’s nothing to worry about based on someone elses perceptions, everyone has their pet peeves, wants and haves and hates, me i’m not trying to give, or take from someone I would rather be alone but if I need to talk, I’m going to try talk politely and to the point as possible so I can get out of the situation ASAP without looking a bit bad to all. No point trying to go around pleasing people that wouldn’t give to F’s about you at the end of the day everyone has their own problems they have to sort out even the people that appear the most well can sometimes have the most issues. and the more you sober up and grow older and mature you realize we’re all the same, we all grew up the same, albiet some from different lively hoods but we all live, bleed, breathe the same we all wake up and do what we need to. And you can even start to see little things even in huge figures in society that when they speak you can see them from on a human level and realize they took steps to get to where they are, they’re no different then you, but with all this being said… a lot of people don’t see it the same as me, so that’s why i’m reclusive i guess.

My speech is much better now than before my hospitalisation.