Missed a funeral today

I didn’t go to my wife’s grandmothers funeral today. Cause I am afraid I would unknowingly say something offensive like its a like I feel good today or u am happy to be here. Not thinking about where I was. I told my wife but I wonder if she really understands.

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I missed a neighbours funeral a few weeks ago. I just wasn’t up for going.

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I don’t really go outside often because of my sz. and I’m not good at keeping my cool around a lot of people, during long periods of time.

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I went to my uncles funeral when I was around 11 or 12. He and I weren’t that close so during the open casket and church session, I was mostly just talking to the voices and not feeling all that sad. It wasn’t until the very end when I started crying but because Barth (one of the voices) started saying how heartless I was and everything

Do what’s best for you and almost any strange behavior will be written off as your way of grieving

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