Messing with my mind

The neighbors are scaring me. They do low stuff and it makes me wonder how far they will go to destroy me.

Today, I even mused at work that would they kill me. That thought came and went fast though.

I had plenty of time to myself at work today and came up with a theory of why I can’t make myself clear as to what they’re doing. I think it’s because I’m always assuming that they’re doing stuff that all rotten people do. But now I’m thinking that what they do is particular to them.

Last night I was sitting on the couch and reminiscing about my teen years. It dawned on me that a particular incident was a form of power. I can’t remember what it was. I think I was thinking about when I won some confrontation. I thought, yeah, I have a little power too. Because these guys for the past year have been bugging me and manipulating and flat out intimidating and always win.

I mean wouldn’t a normal person try to assert themselves every once in a blue moon? The guy upstairs immediately *ucked with my mind and erased me experience like it never happened. This is how I live, these people don’t care how much they mess with me or when. They do similar stuff all the time. Frankly, that scares me.

I think, how much further will they go to have whatever hold they have on me. They already stamp out any sign of life I show. Is my fate to be the victim of these losers because they think they know what’s good for me and they want me to be this lifeless, dead body who they can use at will for their own personal use? I’ve never experienced stuff like this in my life.

They have no regard for fairness or common decency.

@77nick77 I have been hearing voices when I am relaxing too. If I don’t have enough to do or human interaction, I start hearing voices and overthinking everything. I also trip out on my neighbors. It sucks! I hope you feel better. What you are experiencing and thinking is not real. Like my stuff isn’t real although at times I want it to be. :joy: Take care!

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Thanks @anon97859349. I’ll consider that.

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They’re evil. It’s too bad you can’t move. I’ve always had evil people, who want to run my life. They’re obsessed with proving they’re normal, at the expense of innocent people, because they can’t get what they want legally.

I’m sorry you’re going through such a hard time. What helps you feel calm? Do you have any stress relievers?

I weigh the pros and cons of my living situation when I don’t like what’s going on in the house. As long as the positives outweigh the negatives, I choose to stay here. But often, I dream of leaving.https://youtu.be/81NROmUb7o0

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