Can hallucinations help create false memories from decades before a diagnosis?
I dont know, could be.
I dont trust my mind anymore
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yes. i had this. i ztruggle to type. d9nt know what from. they are of hoppung freight trains out west to luvibg in a flop house dont know. seeing as how ive told frienss aboyt the darkest i dobr kniw what. from a good family is all ive got going.
they are false. ate my mind aluve from 24 years old.
Possibly. I always ask people if they remember the same thing. When things seems faded or I’m unsure
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yes i believed things for a while fresh out of psychosis that were false memories from my childhood…it happens.
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And how do you start remembering them? Are they visual memories? Do they have detailed content?
Did those memories accurately explain inconsictencies and mysteries in your real lived life?
I’ve had some confusion around memories. But i’ve since read that memories are not accurate anyway since the process of recalling regards a reinterpretation through the representation the brain/nervous system) makes of an event.
Even then, there has to be a way of telling truths apart. Witnesses, fears, exploring the interpretation of what the memory as it is remembered could mean in terms of how it might impose on social relations or a sense of identity?
One of my psychologists who specialised in trauma therapy said she thinks there is truth even in so called false memories. And i’m thinking, but there has to be. Or else we would all be going around talking about our last hallucination. And what might that impose, on how we then reflect on reality?
It seems that all memories are in some way false by degree. Depends also how you are experiencing an event as it occurs. Like apprehension of an outcome might distort the truth in what has taken place. Or particular biases or ignorance may distort the truth of an event. Fear, or numbing, or dissasociation may lesson the severity of what seemed to occur.
I don’t know seems to be specfic to the type of memory to know whether its narrative occurred or not, exactly.
Also matter of causation. You naturally look to see what has harmed you as a reaction upon recognising something is missing or changed etc. Or experience an outcome after the impact which helps to solidify what happened and corresponds with ones future state of perception? But distortion would seem to occur in any event?
Seems memory is a collaborative event too, as your environment might help to convene the truth/untruth around you, for you to easily see it.
Trauma apparently makes the brain store memory in strange ways. Doesn’t mean it didnt happen. Just a minds way of coping with the event.
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I’ve heard that memories/narrative content of schizophrenic delusions change over time. Like for example you may believe the government is putting implants into you and then it would change to a demonic influence and such.
My experiences and memories aren’t like that. They remain static and as I remember more they slot perfectly into what I always knew occurred.
Have you an opinion on this please?
What do you refer to as static?
Could be that a number of delusions built upon each other and so each confirms the other? And in a time sequence they have a charactarised similarity so you don’t percieve it as ‘false’.
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I don’t know. Are delusions different from memory as they involve imagination and memory and interpretation of reality?
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Maybe if you can figure out if your ‘memories’ have truth to them you can cancel out the delusion part. Though this may take some time.
Sorry if i’m confusing you by saying obvious things. I think I ramble. As im trying to make sense of things for myself also.
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Static as in I broke down in 1998 years before any symptoms. I only remembered snippets of it.
2001 a girl changed her mind about me for no apparent reason.
2010 met another woman and fell in love. 2013 had dealings with some powerful people.
2014 became symptomatic. Lasted 8 days.
Nothing for years. 2020 symptomatic again. Learned to master my hallucinations in 2021. Hallucination said its all positive from here on in.
It helped me retrieved suppressed memories.
The 1998 incident I now apparently fully recall and it was a hell of a lot more positive than i thought. It also 100% explains the inconsistencies in peoples behaviour from back then.
The girl from 2001 apparently changed her mind about me because my hallucination helped retrieve a memory where I had a long talk with her in a pub and suppressed it. Again positive and 100% explains hers and others behaviour.
That’s what i mean by static.
Its not like I was living a normal life and suddenly thought I had implants in my head or the CIA chasing me or something. Things inconsistent with my real past you know?
It all slots perfectly together. Its also helped almost completely heal my CPTSD.
How can an illness heal?
That’s the problem. According to my fresh old memories I told everyone involved to keep their mouth shut to me until the time is right. I don’t want to wait around for something that may never happen though you know?
I am pretty certain, yes.
It can be really hard to remember what was manufactured and what wasn’t
But reality is porous and our own perceptions relating to memories and events can be highly contaminated by our own internal prejudices and associations
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I dunno. I was genuinely shocked by the new memories. I wasn’t expecting them at all. They were about events that happened decades ago I hadn’t thought about much since.
My hallucination also pointed to an incident from 2000 that I always new happened but never thought about since because it was no big deal to me.
My hallucination pointed out it was a big deal to other people which I also knew at the time. But it made sure I knew it impressed people because it was showing me positive aspects of myself.
I don’t get it.
My memories stretch back thousands if not millions of years
Reincarnation was a deep seated delusion for me years ago, but who’s to say it wasn’t all real?
No one can prove me right or wrong, can they? Conclusively?
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Whats helped me to figure out my memories and distinguish between errors in perception has been to journal my memories, and thoughts about events and also see psychologist’s. But I havent had positive experiences with psychologists and was forced.
Its difficult knowing what to say as I think its just been time with me. I also have had ‘flashbacks’ which seems similar to what your describing but your calling them hallucinations? Is it the way your mind is packaging a memory that is highly different from what your used to so you are seeing it as a hallicination. Maybe you have more valuation for re-remembering events as they hold alot of meaning for you, as you felt some kind of impact on changing events in your life.
Ive also heard that as we get older we remember past events like they never occurred before.
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I had a lot of visions, interactive hallucinations, ‘past’ memories and visitations I thought regarded reincarnations. But they were so weird, strange, superb, surreal I can distinguish those from my day to day memories. But with you maybe your having difficulty more understanding relationships between hallucination and ‘memory’ as they are closer to reality experiences?
I was told by my psych she thought I had CPTSD instead of PTSD. She told me that the brain can be set off as a network of traumatic experiences and the result of a subliminal trigger can activate the network of memories. If for some reason during the traumatic event that historically occurred, your brain was unable to store the memory properly due to dissociation, etc. Then you can have triggered a psychosis or extreme swings of mood, in relation to the stimulous of re-remembering. So maybe with you, you have the two problems mixed also as your diagnosed with a psychotic disorder and CPTSD.
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