I am just kind of thinking last days… SZ brings confusion. Sometimes I am so confused that I don’t truly understand what my goals are, even what my personality feels like! Like..
sometimes I think, what If I am just delusional ATM and do not realise the truths about me or life?
Overall, it’s harder to work or keep long term relationships.
I also realised that SZ (or medications, or lifestyle which is connected to SZ) really shortens lifespan.
What’s the meaning of life, then? If it’s harder to work and maintain relationships? And the thing that I may need meds for life. It means - zero personality, only medicine makes me stable and normal?
Idk. Quite depressed.
The meaning of life is what you make meaning of . For me it’s just simple things like going for a walk. Appreciating life your surroundings . Being exsisting in this planet . This planet is alive so we are. The meaning of life is just living it and enjoying it. I don’t think you need super high achievements to enjoy life
if that would be so easy, probably I am just an idealist. @Frenzy I remember in my life when things were going really smoothly, and when I didn’t need to take meds,
Ofc there are days when I am super thankful and very glad, just because I am alive, I am breathing, moving, having nice chats and irl talks with loving, caring people… but still. Sometimes I feel like my brain is destroyed.
And then when I think deeply- maybe I am a pain in an a**. I should be glad. Things are better than during my first psychosis, yet… yeah we always want more and more.
