Just had the crappiest massage ever

I bought a massage on Groupon. It was a 60 minute full body massage combined with a 60 minute foot massage. First off, it was freezing in there, so I was cold the entire time. Cold floors and just a sheet to drape with. Second, she spoke virtually no English. She was way too aggressive with my massage and there was no way for me to communicate to her “less pressure” or “gentle” because she spoke no English. So I am freezing cold (literally shaking) getting this too aggressive massage and after an hour she says “thank you” and it took 10 minutes (of my massage time) for me to show her on my phone that I paid for 2 hours. FINALLY, she does my feet. Again, too aggressive and I am freezing. WHY did I lay there the whole time? Good question and I don’t have an answer. At the end, I get dressed and go to leave and she tries to charge me. I told her I already paid and she kept saying “No, that’s just booking.” so I have to pull up the email on my phone that shows I already paid ($128) and she has the nerve to say “But no tip”. So what does doormat, over here do? I gave her $10.

So I paid $138 to freeze to death while having my A$$ kicked by this woman.

Massages are my FAVORITE thing! If I win Powerball, I am hiring a live-in masseuse, but today’s massage was HORRIBLE. I just got home from having it. What a waste of money :frowning:

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@non-average, some massage therapists are terrible. I used to get massages. I’ve had amazing massages and horrible ones. Hopefully you don’t get another bad one.

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Personally I don’t like massages and they’re expensive. I have a massage gun at home and sometimes we give each other a massage with the gun in my family, we wear clothes of course. When I was young I went a few times with friends to Thai massage, Asian massage. The girl barely spoke english and she was using her feet to massage me she was literally stepping and jumping on my back lol

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Thats the massage gun:

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I have to say, I have a foreign dentist who has a very thick accent. Her staff barely speak English. Most of their patients are from the same country the dentist is from. It’s great for them, but I have great difficulty in communicating with them and understanding them. It’s very frustrating. I think my dentist is an honest person and I like that about her but it’s just so frustrating. I have a hard time finding dentists who take my insurance, and I got her name from my insurance so I’m sticking with her. But I really wish communication was easier there.

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The last massage I got before this one was an “Asian massage” and she walked on my back and was very aggressive. I like a light to medium pressure massage. I haven’t had good luck the last couple times.

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I’m sorry that happened to you,

But I have to admit, your story was well written and hilarious.

I actually in tears laughing.

Thanks!

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Doesn’t sound like a happy ending.

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First world problems. Funny though.

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Glad I could entertain ya’ll! :slight_smile:

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I’m really sorry you wasted all that money. That’s a big chunk of money to go out the door for something not to be of benefit to you and to actually harm you. It would be nice if you could find someone you liked and then go to them on a regular basis so you would know what you’re getting.

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it may have gotten better.

back in the day, you never knew what you’d catch.

funny business was going on.

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Agreeing with @GoldenRex. That is a terrible experience, but you definitely have a talent for story telling.

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That doesn’t exactly sound like the trappings of a legitimate massage.

Sure it wasn’t a “rub-rub” joint? Here in California we have a real problem with sex trafficking young girls into illegitimate parlors.

Might not want to go back.

I’m so sorry you had that experience. My masseuse is a tiny American girl. But she has very strong hands to give me very firm massages just the way I like them.

I’ve been with her many times. At first, the room was cold, her hands were freezing and the rubbing oil was cold. Now, we have an understanding and everything is warm before I come in the room.

lol yea it had me laughing too… =D

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Hahah - The ex wife had a similar device, and lets just say she didnt just use it on her back :stuck_out_tongue:

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Ugh. I’m sorry. that sucks. My last massage sucked, too. But it was the opposite problem – she barely used any pressure at all. And it was in a Vegas hotel spa, so it was really pricey. What a waste.

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I’d love that! 15

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Jelly! That’s my favorite place!

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