I went in all guns blazing, like, “i don’t have schizophrenia, I was massively abused as a child & have Borderline Personality Disorder and don’t your dare disrespect me like my childhood abusers did by invalidating me.”
And after I showed him pictures (by me) of the abuse and described my current day symptoms, written by me in a time of insight…he said, “yup, I confirm, you’re schizophrenic.It was caused by trauma.” Even though I don’t have delusions or hear disembodied voices. Why is it that I don’t have any symptoms typical to SZ and get that dx?
It’s so frustrating as I don’t hear voices or have delusions.
I’m the same off medication @MisterCrowley. No disembodied voices or delusions.
I recently tapered off my meds all-together and what I noticed is that my anxiety increased to sheer terror. Constant terror. All I could do was sit on the sofa & bite my fingernails until they bled.
On meds the anxiety decreases from terror to high anxiety. The psychotic symptoms continue exactly the same as if I’m not on meds. I can mask my psychotic symptoms & function in society (I have 2 jobs), I’m just careful not to talk out loud to myself in public so as to protect my reputation. When I go hike in the wilderness I talk out loud to myself all I want, it’s just the trees & the wind that see & hear me.
Thanks for your reply. What are your symptoms @MisterCrowley, are you able to work?
You could ask for a second opinion. Most pdocs I think would be cautious to diagnose sz without any delusions or hallucinations I think? I could be wrong.
Yeah I feel like I’ve gotten a misdiagnosis too. Before I started my ap I never had delusions or heard voices, or saw things etc. The only things I did struggle with before being diagnosed and taking a ap were 1. Depression, 2. Anxiety 3. Anger (As a result of my abusive family). I feel very invalidated too by my pdoc and generally my whole family. If you you have an abusive controlling family I recommend you find ANY way to CUT ALL TIES with those people. People can be self centered and only have their own interests in mind. My father was never really there for me and was a horrible role model. My mother trys to micromanage my life. I have made tremendous progress in the past few years though by getting a disability income, my own apartment, and food stamps to support myself. It won’t be too long before I can cut my toxic family members out of my life for good. Being independent and having a car also helps and finding a supportive community of people you can trust outside of your family for support and validation of your feelings. I wish I had all the answers for you but I’m still trying my best to find my own answers to my problems I have in life. I wish you the best of luck and may God Bless you.
