Its not so much that i want to die,

it’s more like i want to be reborn and have a 2nd crack at life. but for some reason im not enjoying my current life very much anymore.

I think we all want a 2nd go at life.

But you’re still quite young.

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yeah i feel this place, i mean where i live, has beaten me into submission and i’ve given up on my dreams now. i wonder if a change of scenery would be good for me. or maybe this is just the new me and a different location wouldnt help.

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i got a long ways to go before i finish this race haha. i’ve taken up smoking in the past couple of years. i see no reason for me to live to old age, but may change my mind, i will reevaluate my life every 3 to 5 years i guess.

in the meantime i read books and study for my next life as a physical therapist, or druid haha.

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Thats who I was before sz but only worked with my degree for a week as I was psychotic. I wish sz had hit me much later in life than 21-22y.o.

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After I was put on meds I was no more psychotic but developped bad negative symptoms which prevent me from working. Actually they make me stay in bed most of my time unless if I am gaming.

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I want to live/I want to die at the same time. In college psychology the teacher said we all have that.

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Hmm. . .

Wanting To Die Is Not Living Your Life, Not At All, Death Is A New Beginning Yes, But WHY |||+||| :smiling_imp:

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