On Wednesday when I got my shot I had to jump through hoops to get it. First I had to talk to a therapist (just a random one) and she said I can make myself hallucinate and that at least the people behind the boxes for people stocking the shelves who weren’t real weren’t jumping out at me. I was like really?? When I get psychosis I want to get rid of it or my brain gets damaged. Her telling the doctor to give me my shot early was like pulling teeth. They said I can’t get it early next month which sucks. Hopefully my mind doesn’t make me hallucinate or I induce my hallucinations like that therapist says. Which I think is TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE.
I noticed that I could imagine what my voices would say and I would hear it like in my mind. I can also make myself hear very slight whispers but they stop when I get distracted
Maybe, it was 930 at night. Stores and social places freak me out that late. Plus I was worn out because I spent time with my family and tried to be attentive and concentrate the whole time. I was tired from the day. Plus I walked 3.5 miles to get to my aunts house
That’s what the therapist said. She said I was stressed being in her office, nurse said that too. She said no med is going to make everything go away. But being that stressed it was like two days before it started and I started not to be able to feel a connection with people or make eye contact, got the shot and I was settled again. So that’s why I went to get it early cause I felt like something was off and I was irritable
They have done experiments where they reinforce (i.e. reward or punish) hallucinations, and shown that this affects how often people hallucinate. For example, if you really want attention, and you get that attention when you hallucinate, you will likely start to hallucinate more often as a result. Not saying this has happened to OP or to you, just that it sometimes can happen. Also, this kind of reinforcement happens outside of conscious awareness.
This used to happen me when my voices first started. I would hear girls calling me hot when I would walk by them and it always happened. I would hear them saying rank too
When they get reinforced, do they get more severe? Because I believe delusions can reinforce hallucinations and so can thought insertions now that you explained that. I believe all of us who ever hallucinated from sz, has issues every day no matter what meds we are on, its just our stress level that make the hallucinations worse, but they are always there. Luckily my medicince makes them mild now, but I know they are still there, its like a characteristic of my personality that cannot be changed
thanks for explaining that. I feel like I’m relatively stable I don’t hear a loud man criticizing me in public anymore that would make me delusional. I still believe that voice was real because it knew stuff about me, but also told me lies. It deceived me