I have illusions and hallucinations. My nurse explained the difference but I still didn’t really understand. Sometime I look at something and it starts moving, like a picture coming to life. I look away and look back and it’s still happening. Sometimes I see faces moving in things a lot. But I can look away and sometimes it disappears and sometimes not. Sometimes I see an outline of a man or a dark shadowed person and it’s still there. Sometimes a dark dark evil presence with it. Feels demonic. Other times I see a bug shadow thing or outline of a shadow of a cat, and look away and he is gone. The bug was just a price of fluff. Other times it goes away. If it goes away is it just an illusion? If you look away when you see things and then look back, do you still see it?
Is that all you get?
How do these “illusions” effect your quality of life?
Also do you get any delusions that you are perhaps aware of?
Those are the ones I wonder about. I don’t know if those are truly hallucinations.
Yes I get delusions unfortunately. Always a little there, about people following me. Used to be horrible constant fear until the meds. Thought they were following me to the point of where there were cameras and recording devices in my home and car. Only safe place to talk was basement. I thought my office was bugged and that my friends were spies and I took them off facebook. Etc. I would call the police on cars parked. I would approach people who were sitting in cars. I would follow people around the city for following me because I was fed up. Scared one senior citizen real bad. Convinced my husband and coworker a little because I am normally logical. Wouldn’t let my son walk to school on his own because the people who follow me would take my son.
At that time, Have tasted bleach in my water at hospital, husband had to bring water bottles in. Everytime I put my water bottle down it tasted like bleach. Has to take them to the bathroom. No one knew about this one.
I have a lot of fears about just about everything but feels real. Especially at night. We have video cameras everywhere. I have a mirror in my work out room so I can see behind me. My husband has offered to put the video monitors in there but I’m ok with the mirror right now. I mostly feel the dark presence at night. I sleep with the TV on the whole night as a distraction.
Yes there are actual people who do follow me. Now and then they hack my phone and my tv, I have proof. However when I am really sick I get carried away with it.
There are others but a lot to write and gets my mind rolling.
How illusions or hallucinations affect life. The illusions scare me because sometimes they feel evil, I am afraid to get out of bed to use the washroom or afraid to go to my bedroom . Other times I think I have Alzheimer’s or dementia, in my family. But my psych is ordering CT scan. I have a vivid imagination I was told because diagnosed with schizotypal so I imagine it there I think and then my mind plays tricks on me and maybe then I see it and then maybey GAD kicks in and makes me anxious and real… Maybe that’s my guess but I’m not my doctor. Maybe my brain is aging. I don’t know I’m fed up with living like this but I have kids and good husband.
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