Just had a worrying new one for me - surges of power - after doing wrong
that is as focked up as anything
I remember when I was still a child, we were at our babysitters house and my parents car needed the battery charged. So they had the two cars hooked up together when something went wrong and one of the cars caught on fire. I just burst out laughing. My mom was mad at me and didn’t understand why I would be laughing but I didn’t know why I was either.
I laugh at slasher movies and other things that other people act afraid of… (I don’t like slasher movies though). When someone tells me something terrible I have to stop myself from laughing, but it’s not because I think it’s funny. It’s like someone has pinched me, or yelled “Boo’” or something. I get a sudden surge of adrenaline and my apparent protective response is laughter…
I get super angry at little things that probably wouldn’t bother most people (I posted a thread about that), but I don’t know if that’s related…
I’ve had problems where it feels like there are 3 different personalities or more reacting to an event. And I get this painful as hell confusion, and don’t know what to display on my face.
This is just awful but I know that it’s related to my SZ.
I was in my twenties and I was staying over my friends house.
His father had just died of Pancreatic Cancer and when he broke the news to me, I started chuckling.
Totally out of place and awkward.
I hated myself for a long time afterwards.
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When I was on geodon I had a huge problem with laughing at things that shouldn’t be laughed at.
I didn’t feel like it was funny but I would laugh anyway.
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I’m lucky I don’t laugh at heavy subjects. I hold back the inappropriate emotion and force it into a small smirk. It still makes me feel uncomfortable as hell though. Feel like my face gets a workout.
I’ve always had opposing reactions to how I should. Happy go lucky on the day someone died and the whole school was in mourning. No tears at the funerals of my mom and grandparents. Strange glee as a child trying to kill my brother.
The weirdest is the gore fanaticism, where I’m particularly excited to see gore, even sometimes turned on by it. It’s strange.
I make sarcastic remarks to my wife about Little House on the Prairie while she’s watching it. I think it’s hokey. Apparently with her that’s an inappropriate emotion. My inappropriate emotions border on being matters of taste.
So true! When I went in for my first crisis admission I started laughing at the prospect of my own potential suicide. The psych pointed it out to me that I was laughing at something so somber though. I’ve never burst out laughing at a funeral but I remember my reaction at 9/11. I won’t go into detail but I wish I would have handled that news better. I’ve always regretted my reaction to that event.
Intelligent peeps always act innappropriately.
They see more of the puzzle.
The ones who don’t see more of the puzzle will always tell the ones that do that they are behaving strangely.
Ask any genius who has ever lived on earth.
Me for instance, i’ve seen perfect worlds, and so i can properly weigh out how shitty our world is. Makes be behave strangely to say the least.
Like yesterday, i knew that we’re all delusional. I burst out laughing in public because i could see it that we all begin delusional. We’re all going through a trip basically. I was shown i should say that we’re all delusional, otherwise i could not have known it. You have to sort through the info before you come unto the truths.
If you can see the delusions you just act very strangely as opposed to they whom believe what they think at the ripe old age of twenty.
Not to mention the god that just glared at me in my bottle’s reflection. Yes, some being of great power just stared me down in my bottle’s reflection. It revealed itself, simoultaneously horrifying and also drastically interesting.
Of course i’m acting innappropriately as opposed to the blind. I know this goes all the way back to they, those guys up there, the ones that put the moon there. I know all things go back to them.
Yer ■■■■■■right i’m acting innapropriately. Just now on the way to get my dead animal bread sustenance they were explaing how every single process on earth can be absolutely reversed. A walk became a cataclysmic journey of epicly mind blowing proportions.
But you know what they call innapropriate right? Not wanting to â– â– â– â– .
I get that as well. All of my “voices” are more like family to me, that just happen to live in my body with me…they often have different reactions to things as well or I can hear them/feel them react to certain things and it can be distracting.
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