I'm losing everyone

I got schizophrenia 20 years ago I’m 41 now. Last week my mom ended up in the hospital with a collapsed lung. Yesterday I found out she has lung cancer she’s only 58. Within the last year both of my grandmothers got alzheimers. My dad died in 1983. I have no brothers or sisters. I have 2 aunts and 3 uncles and they’re all drug addicts. My mom and my grandmothers are all I have. Both of my grandfathers died in the 90’s. I’ll have no one to look out for me.

I could always count on my mom and grandmothers if something happened to me with my illness. I struggle with it every day but I have some sanity. I haven’t had a relapse since 1997. I take my medication every day.

I’m on disability and I have a good doctor. I worry something could happen like losing my disability or something. I wouldn’t be able to get my medication. If I had a psychosis or something I wouldn’t be able to take care of myself and won’t have anyone to look out for me. I only have 1 friend.

It’s not any consolation but my grandmother is leaving me the house and her car. I won’t be able to afford the taxes on the house. I’m gonna have to sell it. I’m worried Social Security would cut me off and I would lose my health insurance.

I’m scared my mom is scared. All I can do is tell her I love her. I don’t know what to expect or what the future holds.


I’m so sorry this is happening to you. If it’s any consolation, my old landlord had lung cancer the whole two years I rented from him, and he’s still here five years later. Modern medicine is getting better all the time.


@Wantsome480, My son, who was paranoid sz, was kind of in the same situation as you, before he died from suicide. I had a house and a car and some money to leave him but he was on SSI and he couldn’t inherit anything and expect to keep his SSI and Medicaid. He needed his Medicaid for his medications. He would never have been able to afford the taxes on the house or all the other expenses that go along with a house, so, he would have had to sell the house. That would have left him with a big pot of money that SSI does not allow. He was literally in a bind. I think all this stress contributed greatly to his demise. He could not solve his problems. And I could not help him because I myself was mentally ill and his problems made my symptoms worse. Today, I would have gotten him a better psychiatrist and better therapist than he had. I also would have done everything in my power to ensure that he accept a depot AP. These do wonders for me. They probably would have done wonders for him too.


I’m on ssdi and the way it doesn’t give incentive to work is troubling to me, because i’d like to make something of myself despite having schizophrenia. There are options other than taking a job with an employer that I could pursue, but I’m afraid of how I might misreport some income. It’s driven me up the wall in the past.

What’s a depot AP? I wanna ask my doctor about it. I’ve been kinda lax about med changes because the abilify has worked, but it’s also made me fat and I can’t seem to get the weight off.

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