I'm fixing a hole where the rain gets in

I dug myself a pit I was never truly able to climb out of. That was when I turned fifteen in the ninth grade. I always had a negative view of drugs. Today I question whether the soft drugs really are as bad as I thought. The hole I dug for myself was mostly constant pot use for three months and I considered it suicide. I couldn’t do school work like that. I used hard drugs a few times but the reaction I got was extreme compared to other people.

I’ve gotten better but after a certain point I believe people just stop progressing. I worked on myself. I became knowledgeable. I cultivated my gifts. And I still feel low like I had become as a teen. My disease diminished my consciousness and I can blame it on that too. Hell is what it bad because it’s forever. This life is not forever.

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I have the other view around. If I wasn´t ill I would be doing recreational drugs (with moderation).

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Nothing will stop my mind from wandering. Where it will go.

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Drug use may only be disclosed in recovery context. Please read the rules.

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