yes, i cant understand the other schizophrenics with positive symptoms… i have mostly negative symptoms… i have ill friends who never were so suicidal as me. dont judge me, i had this since child. it hitted me at 6, 7 years old. ok, its the wrong way still but i didnt knew that what i feel is not normal. i hided it also. and now, i am just so depressed, it is killing me…and its hard for me to see that my ill friends are doing it better than me. they even dont call me so much, they live their lifes…
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I understand where you’re coming from. I was suicidal when I was five years old, telling my mom I was going to jump out the window and kill myself. This is such a hard life we have to live, but things can get better. I am sorry you’re struggling so much right now. I hope you get some relief soon and find some peace in your life. You are in my prayers.