Well, in all honesty, the hospital will change your meds. They will probably give you a shot to feel immediately better, and then monitor you for a day or so. They will send you home with either new meds or a recommendation to talk to your pdoc about new meds.
I think that shot to immediately feel better will do wonders for you, and help you be able to wait until Friday. It makes sense to get help and suffer less. It also makes sense to go in voluntarily when you aren’t a danger to yourself, rather than waiting until you are in imminent danger and possibly getting an involuntary commitment. Those are much less pleasant.
But you know yourself well enough that if you say you can wait, I believe you.
I just don’t want to drag Little LED to the hospital (45 minutes each direction) in three middle of the night since it’s already her bedtime. I’m hoping that if I can get some sleep tonight I’ll be better in the morning. But if I’m not I’ll go in then.
Last time I went to the hospital was 2019. I went because I hadn’t slept for 7 days straight and I wanted them to knock me out. I wasn’t a danger to myself or others, but they gave me good meds and I was able to sleep.
Well stay safe tonight, whatever you decide. If you can’t sleep, the crisis text line can be really helpful for just talking you through grounding exercises and just feeling like another living person cares that you exist. I’m gonna link the crisis lines for you in case you want them.
If you are feeling suicidal or having a mental health crisis, please tell someone — a friend or family member, a teacher, a doctor or therapist or call 911 (if you’re in the U.S.) or the Emergency Medical Services phone number in your country.
You can also call a crisis intervention hotline—these are available in the U.S. and in many other countries. You do not need to be actively suicidal to benefit from a crisis hotline.
That crisis text line is all but useless. Have you tried it? It’s like all prerecorded messages and like they’re reading oof a playbook. It’s annoying as hell and leaves you more frustrated than you started.
I like it. I ask them to walk me through the 54321 mindfulness exercise. Idk why but it really helps. Especially when all my friends are asleep and I have no one else to talk to.
I’m tempted to take an extra dose of my meds. I feel terrible. I have to get an ultrasound today to rule out breast cancer because I’ve got some random bloody discharge and a really sore spot. No idea why. Anyways, I think I’m going to go to the er after that. I can’t take this much longer.