it worries me. I ve slept too much yesterday and now I cant sleep. everything pisses me off right now.cant get pleasure from anything(anhedonia plus anger)… should I be worried that ill never get better or its a symptom of my schizophrenia? I am old already like I said you know… its really bad to be ill since child, I am worried because of this also… its a bad prognosis here…
p.s. plus the fact that meds just put me on my feet but I still suffer and I still live between 4 walls. I would like to have a life of me, to feel something for god sake… they cant do more than this the meds? when I made my poll on the pourcentage of the efficacity of the meds on you there were people who said that meds are a great help. for me, its just 30 % maximum this help, its nothing… can I count to see more from them?
Anna, I think you might be the victim of deeply-entrenched negative thinking… I understand that you are suffering a lot. I too get caught in what-ifs about my future, and when I do that, I just refocus to the task at hand. There’s nothing you can do to change your future except for enjoying the moment… that’s all I can say.
yeah but I went so deep in this illness cause I gave up years ago that I cant stop thinking sometimes… meds dont help me on that. I even dont have a sedation its not normal… I am on a big sedative ap for god sake… I wanna be druged maybe…
I spent the last 15 years in my room. how it gonna change this? maybe the damages are too big already?
Very unlikely depending on how you frame that.
But that’s not relevant to the matter at hand, which is practical action.
I understand you are outside of the States… where exactly?
Do you have anyone helping you?
I am in the Balkans @Nomad 
my mom is a great help, she even cooks my eatings… I have some friends but sometimes I demand too much from them or I am not fun anymore I guess… in fact, its just one friend who comes visiting me…
It’s good that you have a friend you see regularly.
Have you heard of “agoraphobia”. Do you think you might have this?
From the way you write I think you have a brighter prognosis than you think.
I am frustrated and angry now pixel to have this life of mine. I want a change already and I am just here, sitting to be angry on this… no action cause the pain is too strong…maybe the anger can diminish with time?
p.s. I cant handle this, ill take a rivotril… I am sad and angry,yes…
You are the change you are waiting for. You’ll need to push past the pain and perhaps harness the anger to do so.
(My 14 year old daughter really liked the last one.)
Anna,
I think you need to keep one thing in perspective, you are still young. 34 is not old. You have plenty of time to move toward your recovery and live the life you want, so don’t worry about catching up.
My advice to you would be to set small goals. Set a small goal like making your bed in the morning or taking a shower. Once you are doing these things daily, set larger goals. This method has really helped me.