I am going to be very sad when my parents die. My dad is 68 and my mom is 65 I think. If I could give them some of my remaining life years I would. I would like for them to outlive me to be honest.
I still have one living sister but I don’t talk to her very often. I don’t talk to my extended family much and I also don’t talk to my remaining friend(s) much. When my parents are gone, I may be quite lonely and depressed.
It’s not so much a question of whether I CAN survive without them, I’m doing ok financially, but a question of quality of life.
Idk. Just thinking on this the last couple hours and thought I would post.
My mom will be 75 next month, my stepdad is 79, and my dad is 76 as of this month. I will really be devastated when they’re gone. Especially when my mom goes. I don’t see my mom often at all because she lives far away, but I talk to her every day on the phone. I would give years off my life for them to live longer and outlive me any day
Yeah, my parents had me young, so I do have that advantage as far as them being around longer. Are you worried about your parents leaving you while you are still fairly young Aziz?
I think my mom might be 66 not 65 and I think my dad turns 69 in february.
My father is 74 or 75 I think and my mother is near 70. I wish my parents would outlive me but I have no choice and I have 2 brothers who will keep an eye on me. I am more close to my little brother than to my middle brother.
I will likely be taking care of myself when my parents pass. You’re a bright guy Aziz. You will get by. My post isn’t so much a question of whether or not I can take care of myself as it is a question of loneliness and missing them. I have lots of extended family and a sister but I have no idea if they will step up and be around. They all have families of their own.
This is really quite sad. I’ve been thinking similarly the past few weeks. All the more pointed to treasure the time you do have left with your elders that you do love and will miss. I’m trying not to think about when they will go. But I imagine it will be like a void has opened up. But who knows its remarkable how people adapt and keeping people close in loving memory. There’s a book the denial of death by Ernest Becker I found quite helpful. But when it comes to it. A book won’t probably help the raw fact of life going missing. It’s quite a blow. I remember my Gran dying of cancer and it really broke my heart. Like a piece of me just left me right then and there. Can’t be replaced. But you do manage to heal the pain somehow. Just still feels kind of empty for me to try to put words to loss and pain that’s so unique to each person. I like lighting candles in Church’s and with well meaning for relatives who have past. Feels like it helps me when I do this. Though i’m unreligious. Or visiting the grave if I can of a few relatives and putting flowers down. I think these kind of rituals can be quite soothing to the mind.
I live a great life now with dad. It costs me over half my pension but I’m secure. Have internet, satellite tv and can live large and save money. He goes it’s a different story. I’ve four other siblings so I probably could get social housing but that is like a ten year wait. Not looking forward to that but I’ll just have to deal with it.
I can agree with the sentiment though. I’m not reproducing so anything I have I’d give to any of my family.
My dad is 64. My mom 62. So I think they still have 20 years to go - at least - and I don’t tend to worry about things that are that far in the future. Many things can happen in the meantime.
YES. I am in this situation. I would love it if my parents outlived me.
I’m 49, and my parents are both 74.
I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle it when my dad dies. I think about it all the time. I’m so scared. He is my biggest support. And I just like the guy. I like talking with him. I will be so broken when I don’t have him around anymore… I don’t know what I will do.
It’s one reason why I’m glad I moved to Florida, even though I hate it. I get to live 10 minutes away from him in his last part of life.
I’m hoping he will live another 20 years. He still works (he’s a lawyer and CPA), and has a line on a new job, possibly, in the next few months. His mind is still sharp, and I hope it stays that way. He also walks every day, and is looking to start biking again. So you never know.
Thankfully, my sister lives about 15-20 minutes away from me, and we’ve become really good friends, after spending our lives barely speaking to each other. It makes me feel a little more secure, at least.