Even though I’m supposed to work all day but I can not concentrate and am very unmotivated due to my depression and meds. I’m depressed to the point that I barely eat one meal a day.
I work as a software engineer and the code base of this company looks like crap and gives me a headache every time I have to fix something.
I have been working for this employer for about 2 months now and they haven’t raised any concerns yet but I’m kind of worried I lose this job in the middle of the pandemic.
Is anyone here doing software development ? How has your condition affected you throughout the years?
I was studying for software developper. I did an internship but that was the most I could do. During the internship I realised how much of my problem solving capabitilies I lost. I wasn’t able to focus on creating new functionalities neither do code reviews. I am not able to read and understand the code of others. It is too demanding for me. I don’t know yet what to do as a job but I think I might need something simpler.
I have lost so much or my problem solving power too. I’m on Invega (injection) but I’m planning to talk to my doctor about possibly changing the medication to something else. I spent about 5 years of my life studying Computer Science and have been working for about 3 years now and I’m afraid of switching to something else even tho software is draining me its pretty much the only thing I’m comfortable doing. I live in Canada and there might be a seasonal depression that will be added on top of everything else as the winter comes. I’m a mess!
Perhaps it might be helpfull to you to be carefull when choosing your next medication. There are medications that cause too much anxiety. And it was impossible for me to code under too much pressure. Good luck
I also did 5 years of Computer Science here in Europe
Honestly I think it’s because you haven’t use your brain in too long so this new work responsibility is making your feel depressed. If you keep at it though, you will gain back your ability to solve difficult problems. Persistence pays off. Besides I think if you are working 2-3 hours a day and they are not raising any issues, I think that is perhaps the work load of the company. Nothing to worry about as long as you don’t screw up their code.
