I really want to see what it’s like and meet other people with schizophrenia. Hopefully as an intern but maybe as a patient if I really ■■■■ myself up by smoking weed, doing LSD, doing cocaine, doing heroin, going off my meds and robbing a liquor store, taking DMT, ect.
Or just not take my meds when I wake up tomorrow.
I’ve been three times. When you get there your only wish is to get out as fast as possible. There’s nothing to do but watch TV, every day you beg God to see the pdoc in charge in hope that she gives more info about your discharge… Maybe you’d like it, it was quite an experience, could’ve done without it though.
No, you do not want to be on a psyche ward except as an intern. I’ll put it this way. If you are so screwed up and psychotic that you warrant being hospitalized I guarantee you will not be enjoy your stay there. If you are in such condition that you need to be in a psyche ward chances are you will be thinking more of your misery and less about having fun. If you want to meet other schizophrenics in a hospital setting then volunteer on a psyche ward with some talent or usefulness that you have. Don’t do drugs!!
Go live in a group home instead. Psych ward patients are psychotic and off their meds before they come in there and not fun to be around. So much more I can say but you don’t want this.
Or volunteer at one.
Been there. Done that.
In the town where I lived a news team sent members into the local state hospital, acting like they were mentally ill. They did get interviewed, diagnosed and admitted, probably medicated. They wanted to see how easy it was and it worked kike a trick. Then they wrote it up in the paper. The head of the hospital resigned - with him, only one head had to roll.
Never been in a psych ward? Wow, that blows my mind. I figured everyone with the diagnosis had ended up there at one point.
How did you get your diagnosis if you’ve not been messed up enough to need the hospital?
I drank too much coffee this morning. I danced around to music. Did sun salutations. I’ve been going from happy to sad to happy to blissful. I think it’s called rapid cycling. I recall at a wedding, I was so messed up for no reason I was crying. I feel like I have to justify myself and my emotions to people too much. It’s hard having schizophrenia but it’s also hard to be bipolar because people will call you a bitch or act like you are whining. It’s hurtful. The amount of self control I have to sustain…not to be compulsive or borderline or obsessive or just dive head first.
Bipolar depression is traumatic, mania is traumatic. It drains and exhausts people. And you know taking drugs can induce all sorts of symptoms it’s not smart. Really, if my mom can be this way from doing nothing then. Ok one minute I feel awesome, but I’m not used to this it overwhelms me I want to control it myself too, but I think sedation is a nice alternative to extreme euphoria or a lack of sense. It’s not that I’m stupid or reckless. I have severe Bipolar and I didn’t even know I did until recently.
I’ll never take drugs. Legal highs are the worst for you. Like sniffing poppers or smoking ■■■■ spice…which both can cause heart attacks. Made to stand trial as a witness. Feeling like I can’t say anything because I’m not sure what to say anymore. I blocked and ended my relationship with someone and all his friends because of it. He was the one who ended our friendship.
And opiates work for me why because I have nerve pain and ptsd so ■■■■ that if someone wants to judge why I would ever try a pain pill. It helps me but ■■■■ them for not prescribing it to me. If I wasn’t treated like a potential drug-abuser it might help me with my low self esteem. I mean does it matter? I have serious serious pain, nerve pain, tinnitus since I was 12. I never abused drugs until after the illness had been present for 5 years or so, but I don’t have an extensive history. I smoked weed since I was 21, I’m now 26. I don’t get sick like I used to. weed helped me overcome some things, but not enough. I need actual medicine. I need something to help me with the depression, pain, fatigue, adhd.
It’s not helping to be told to get over it while no one cares enough to help me. Money doesn’t solve ■■■■. ■■■■■■■ do something to help me.
I’m not a plastic doll. I’m not here for people to toy with or tease or abuse. I’m not here to be looked down on.
I was thinking about how great it would be if I had enough dignity to go into one, but the idea of being stripped into a gown, walked through a hospital blazes through my notion of security. I was already poked with effing toothpicks when I almost died. People don’t have compassion enough to care for the sick. We are a deeply disturbed race of creatures, and I must not be normal because most people don’t see in more than one direction.
Things break and you can’t always fix them. But life is not a thing…and you can evolve out of this experience.
You’re posting a lot about illegal drugs as of late. You doing okay? Keeping your therapist in the loop?
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I meant if I did those drugs. I’ve only done weed I the past, two years ago
Apologies for mis-reading your posts. I admit to being dysfunctional enough that I keep a mental list of people who irritate me that I wouldn’t mind seeing suffer. Your name isn’t on it, thus my concern. 
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I was formally evaluated for a week and took the MMPI. I had acute episodes but my parents didn’t commit me, they totally could have. My case is chronic but drugs make it have “episodes” of sorts; taking five scoops of noxplode and two nitric oxide pills while not on meds made for one hell of a night.
Jesus H Christ on a pogo stick, d00d. Don’t DO that! That shiz will get your molecules vibrating so fast you can probably phase thru solid objects a la Kitty Pryde. The one sample pack of NOxPlode Supplements Canada sent with my ON whey protein was responsible for the best manic episode I’ve had since quitting amphetamines over two decades back. And you’re stacking it???
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That was when I was legally insane years ago
I’ve been speaking in the past tense
It’s verrrrrrrry boring… Unless you believe that you can talk to people with your mind and fall in love with a girl that says every thing you think. Then it’s not boring.
But if you go in because you try to refuse your meds and the police get called and you get under a civil commitment. Then It’s verrrrry boring, and frustrating.
Yes I agree, its very boring. Been there six times. I voluntarily admitted myself, so I was eager to go, and it was fun talking to other schizos, and Bipolar sufferers, but there’s only so much you can do, it gets very boring after a week or two unless you are in an intensive therapy ward program.
Some of my visits contained gore.
A person gashed their arms all the way from wrist to elbow, it was deep to.
And a guy fell down from being so out of it and his skull opened up and the blood pooled on the ground.
Some people tore down the curtains, some talked of controlling the weather, people’s heads were involuntarily moving around from pills, a girl was chewing her own tongue at one point.
I myself escaped at one point, they pulled up behind me a little down the road right after.
And all of the nutter butters and soda you could handle in the midst of all of this.
■■■■!
Worse, the neurotic housewives hog the television remote control and cut off any possibility of Star Trek or X-Files goodness. You have to watch talk shows and soap operas. (I haven’t been in a psych ward since Netflix became a ‘thing’ – it would have helped, believe you me!)
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