Schizophrenia.com

How did you spend your time while in the hospital?

First of all, any hospital I have been in was very boring. I tried to sleep as much as I possible. Most hospitals I was in had a pool table or ping-pong table. I could usually hold my own with those two.
One hospital had a basketball court out back, I spent a lot of time shooting baskets by myself. My akathesia was always too bad to sit and watch TV. At Stanford psyche ward it was right across from Stanford Mall and a counselor took a few of us there to a coffee shop and treated us to coffee.

The first few times I was told I just sat, rocked back and fourth and watched the walls, or played with my toes and hardly communicated in anyway. I didn’t watch T.V. either. Most of it didn’t make sense. I drew a lot and wrote in my journal almost non-stop. But when I read those journals now, well, it’s too painful. I’m trying to talk myself into getting rid of them.

I was also in a lot of counseling for staying clean. When I was getting a little better and starting to pay attention to the world outside my head, I would read. I read the dictionary and the thesaurus cover to cover.

I like the Thesaurus better, it’s more optimistic. I was horrid at the sports. My hand eye coordination was shot and my balance wasn’t too great. But if I did my chores, took my meds, and didn’t do anything too disruptive, a counselor would walk me down the block to the therapy center’s pool and I could swim.

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The last time i was in hospital, which was for nearly two years, i spend a lot of time in the industrial therapy unit. Basically it was like a factory set up in that you clocked in and involved doing light packing work. You got paid a nominal sum of a few pounds a week.

When I first started going into hospitals I’d sleep or stay in my room. Then I realized that to get out fast you need to stay out of your room, participate in groups, be sociable, and most importantly, make your bed (yeah that’s a weird one).

Most of the times I’ve been in I go into “get out” mode and do all the above things just to get out as soon as possible. It doesn’t always wok, and I wasn’t always capable of trying but if you can, that’s the way to go to get out fast.

I did not want to socialize at all. I had my earphones on, listening to the book of revalations. I made puzzles in the hobby room. Mostly alone.

Well… When my meds worked I stopped listening to the bible. I also had the bible under my pillow for protection. I thought I could walk on water. I never got a chanse to try it because the front door was always locked.

Now when I’m “normal” I don’t read the bible or go to church. Also I believe in reincarnation.

I saw a horrible accident where a guy busted his skull open on the hard tile floor.

Several suicide attempts i witnessed.

wrestling matches between patients and staff.

A guy smuggled in some pot and i helped myself to some, and holy ■■■■ was that incredible strange to do.

Another girl smuggled in some xanax and i helped myself to some of that as well.

I waited for smokes, waited to get out, waited for meals, waited for sleep, waited for groups to be done, the whole thing felt like waiting actually.

I had been targeted by a mexican fellow also, he walked up behind me and began punching me all of a sudden, someone was speaking with that poor chap, i knew it. He was very freaked out by it, as i was when they were speaking to me, i could see it.

One guy shared that he could control the weather, that he made it snow once, i finally figured out what he was saying to, during my psychosis “whomever” showed up and the first night mentioned in a very strange way that they had controlled the weather, i sat up with them all night that halloween when it began, yeah i know why that guy was saying that.

Some people were trying to make out also, i couldn’t stand it, it made me sick, just awful.

My doctor had a heart attack and this kept me from going to a state hospital, i had my doctors switched and the new guy said “no state hospital, we’ll try you without meds and you are free to go.” Lucky right?!

If im reincarnated im going to go actually insane and start killing, i don’t want to be here again and i was forced to do it the first time.

The first night in during my first hospitalization i was terrified so i just sat on the bed and rocked back and forth. Eventually another patient coaxed me out and i had a chocolate milk. They didn’t give me meds the first night until i saw the doctor the next morning. The first night i booby trapped my door with the trash can so whenever someone came into the room i would hear a loud thud and i would wake up. Well they frowned at that and moved me in with a room mate. I learned how you get out quicker, don’t tell them you still hear voices, make your bed and eat your food. I did all those things and was out in about a week.

The second time i was so out of it i barely remember my stay, they kept me pretty drugged and tranquelized for the first couple of days. I slept the whole time i was sedated. Then they switched me to a medicine regimen. I found out what i needed to do to get out and i lied to get out again.

the first time was terrifying in the beginning, and the second. the third time i only stayed one night as i was too terrified to stay there. in hindsight they should have sectioned me but they didn’t. i spent most of my time responding to programming the way i was meant to, being a gibbering wreck but by the third week the bubble burst and i was a non believer in the voices lead bollocks. all of my “psychoses” have been lead by voices. i now choose not to believe a word they say so if there’s another hospital stay on the horizon it’ll b because i’m being harassed by out of body mercinaries because the voices aren’t strong enough on their own to make me believe in ■■■■ anymore.

Hanging out with friends - This was the best therapy I could have had.

I didn’t do much. We were only allowed five cigarettes a day. I normally smoke a pack and a half, so I was extremely bored. I ate every meal, and they also had a vending machine, which I used. Then I would eat and drink in my room too. I probably gained weight while I was there both times. It’s just that I was so bored that I wanted something to do, like eat. I also read. The first time I was there I was having a delusion that the dictionary was speaking truths to me that no one else understood. I thought it was a magical dictionary. So I read that at first. Then another person there, a young girl, wanted to read my dictionary, so I let her take it. Then I wanted something else to read, and the only other things that I had were my Bible and some religious tracts. So I asked them for my Bible, and they kept saying that they would give it to me, but they were not, in fact giving it to me. So I leapt behind the nurses station to try and get it myself. They all came out and made me get back. I yelled to them, “I just want my Bible. I just want my Bible.” Then they finally gave it to me and I had something to read. I also went to the group meetings, because someone had told me that that’s what you do to get out of there faster. The group meetings were ■■■■■■■■. It was mostly just a counselor going around the room asking you what your goals were for the day. Then everyone would say stuff like, “stay positive,” and other meaningless things. Then, at the end of the day, they would ask you if you achieved you goals for the day. I was still highly psychotic when I left the first time. And the second time I was still having violent intrusive thoughts when I left, which was the reason why I went there in the first place, but school was starting soon, so I had to get out of there.

I recall a lot of sleeping, medication induced, walking around in circles, I had a vision of people in the other hospital doing surgery on people’s bodies so I was afraid to go there to get my antibiotics. I thought they were going to wheel me in an EEG machine blast horrible rap music and do the whole “body replacement” thing that my mom talks non-stop about. Well, I didn’t go. I also was not anesthetized because the dude was too cool to do it. Which is kind of freaky isn’t it? Where would that stretcher have led me? That’s what scares me. THe going on the stretcher, coming back with no memory of what was done to you except a faint glimpse of nurses with blue masks and fashing lights, and then the incisions…on the other hand, I have been hearing this ringing before I was hospitalized. Although, I do recall flipping out on several occasions and making a scene over thinking I was Mary Magdalene reincarnted here to save the world and high on life. Now i’m paranoid, but u know what I saw this coming I’ve had premonitions about the schizophrenia right about when I was getting schizophrenic, I realized it. Yeah. Now I’m trying to forget whatt it was like to be crazy. I still don’t give a ■■■■ about society and I’m still the same girl I always was bbut I don’t have as many epically depressing thhoughts .

I was by myself in a room with three beds, nightstands and desk. It took me about an hour to flip all the furniture upside down and place it 180degrees from it’s original position. Man those beds were HEAVY.
One psych tech walked by within 10 minutes and yelled very loud that whoever was in room (?) to put everything back the way it was.
No sense of humor, but all the staff had to come by to have a look-some laughed.

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Lol. Good one csummersx. I got laughed at by the orderlies for sleepwalking. One day in this same hospital, it was my duty one day to pick up all the trash on the huge back lawn. It was littered with cigarette butts and miscellaneous pieces of paper and I was supposed to check in with this beautiful nurse and prove I did it.I came back with the cellophane from a pack of cigarettes, three cigarette butts, and a candy wrapper.The beautiful nurse just laughed and told another nurse how cute that was.

No hospital I was in let us outside, and when I was in them I was a smoker, which sucked. No tv, not internet, no books, no magazines, no newspapers, it was so boring. They did have boardgames so I played alot of scrabble to pass the time, even just by myself. And slept alot too. I have learned to keep my mouth shut so I’m never put back into one of them again.

During the first few of many hospitalizations they took us outside on a walk a few blocks away for ice cream, thought it was odd that only one psych tech came along since there was about 15 of us. Another time we just went for a walk around the block or two times, something unheard of nowdays.

While in my first psyche ward in 1980, I went jogging with a counselor in the hills. They don’t let patients outside nowadays? At all? At my hospital it wasn’t a locked ward. Meaning we could wander around the rest of the non-psychiatric hospital. I remember getting up early one day and walking to the park by myself. And I was a naive 19 years old. The hospital was a hundred miles from my home and I didn’t know the area at all, I had never been in that city. I was actually braver when I was at my worst then I am now. A month later I was in Soteria House, it was 5 minutes from downtown in a large city. I regularly walked downtown, among the hookers, the sex shops, the homeless, and the gangs.

I was only allowed outside the first two times I was in, that was back in 1996. I’ve been hospitalized 25+ times total, the last time was in 2007. All were locked wards and no freedom outside on our own. Maybe because I was considered an escape risk, because one time I did escape and run , they weren’t real happy because they never found me, that after that I never got to see sunlight when inside.
Not exactly the best way to get better.

When i was in hospital they let us go outside freely, when not doing OT or going to the ITU, unless you were on a closed ward or marked down to be accompanied off the ward with a nurse. All patients weren’t supposed to go out after 9 .

I have only been hospitalized once. I found out quickly that the way to get out was to go to group and take my meds. There was nothing to do. No tv to watch. I found a book to read. As soon as I was able I petitioned myself out and left. Never going back.