That’s what I write:
…Where time runs away, I no longer understand. I’m left to watch it all like a sunset. You can’t stop it.
And as I increasingly understand how differently the paths of our lives unfold… where the currents of life take us - I become even more lost. As if there’s something in all of that unpredictability, yet at the same time predictable. As if I see things I already knew would happen, and I see things that frighten with their unexpectedness. If only it were possible to stop for a moment - I would throw everything to do so. To understand. And yet still not fully understand.
So I live watching, observing, and observing. Only occasionally managing to catch my breath, to look at it from the sidelines, as if with different eyes. And yet everything still happens too quickly for me to fully comprehend… so I live, scattering unexpectedly much of myself, time, while at the same time trying to preserve something I don’t even understand myself.