I probably should try for a baby at 39 instead of in my 40s

[san_pedro]

Before my son, I felt lost in life When he was born he gave me direction and focus even now

words can’t describe it all in my view

[Zoe]

Sounds good.

[Qwerty]

I had my first son at 38 and my second when I was
40. I was not stable enough to have had children younger.

[Zoe]

Yes i understand that.

I also dont feel strong enough right now.

In my case i need to sort out my self esteem a little so that i dont go too cookoo.

Congratulations on being a mom tho.

[anon82948922]

@Bowens

She’s 48.

I can tell you that your energy for kids drops fast after you hit your fifties. Having a six year old when you’re 55 is gonna be a world of hurt.

[Patrick]

Don’t recommend having a child when you are pushing 40. Too great a chance of having a baby with issues.

[Qwerty]

@anon82948922

Having a six year old when you’re 55 is gonna be a world of hurt

2 children 4 and under and I am 42. It’s exhausting.

[Zoe]

I just read something crazy. Chances of late miscarriage at 40 is 51 percent.

[anon82948922]

@Zoe

I just read something crazy.

Honestly, not crazy. Even with medical advances, 40 is at the far end of the window for having kids.

[Trooper]

I am 55 and being tempted with having children by my family. I think if I had a child I would have to totally devote myself. I would of course be putting myself in a situation of acceptance of all that can happen good or challenging to my purpose. I think I would be a cool dad. Definitely a lot to think about.

[NinjaComet]

@Bowens

My wife wants to get pregnant

Make sure she checks with her neuro. I was advised against pregnancy because of the strain it would put on my CSF system.

[Bowens]

A good suggestion. Also, I fear that she could fall as her balance is often not good. That could be a danger for a baby. Both during pregnancy and after.

[NinjaComet]

@jaynebeal

i’m a parent of two children, a girl and a boy aged 18 and 15 respectively. i’ve answered this question many times.

when thinking of having children with your unique set of problems you have to ask yourself many questions and be brutally honest with your answers. children are for life, not till they are 18 and you have to ask yourself if you can cope with many situations before you even think of having a child.
when you give birth to this child you will need to be able to survive on four hours sleep for at least three months. can you handle the piercing cry of a baby for about a YEAR.
are you able to remain stable through your lack of sleep.
can you bathe the baby evey other day at the least, can you do three or four loads of washing every day for the next 18 years,
can you present yourself in a clean manner every day for the next 18 years.
can you handle simple things like going to the supermarket every day, diving a car to take your baby to appointments like drs, dentist, school every day, dance classes, football practice, engaging with other parents when your child makes frends at nursery, school, college,
can you be clean and presentable for all those things.
can you hamdle talking to a two year old non stop from the minute they wake you at 5am till they go to bed at 7pm and that’s provided they haven’t woken in the night for any reason which they frequently do.
can you handle getting physically ill and then mentally ill becase of it when your child brings home colds, flu and stocmach bugs which they frequently do.
what happens if you get sick mentally? who will look afte the child? do you have a strong support network? is your husand a normie? coz if he is and you split up he may go for custody of the child, especially if you’ve had episodes of not being well throughout it’s life.
can you handle losing a child? you have to think of all these things and a million more i haven’t even gone into before you think of having a child.

my best advce to you is to get and 8 week old puppy ad see if you can handle that. if you can then great. if you can;t then dont even think of having a child because you will not be able to cope. i have a chihuahua puppy right now. she is 10 weeks old and peeing and pooing everywhere. i must spend most of my day and night going into the garden and waiting for her to do her business, she eats about ten times a day and when she is not asleep she is chewing everything in sight. this puppy is so small that her bladder and bowels are miniscule and she cannt hold it in all night which means frequent trips to the garden at 12am, 1am, 2am, 3am etcetera so i grab sleep when i can…that is what it’s like having a newborn baby… can you handle that?

Best advice I ever got on here

[devra]

I think you’d make a great mother. It’s more important to be a younger mother, than getting your situation settled. I’m sure things will turn out well.

[Zoe]

Thankyou Devra.

[see121]

I’m too old (I’m 48 years old) and don’t have the finances and lifestyle for a baby but when I was young probably would have liked 1 or 2 kids, a boy and a girl. Also if I was married to that perfect someone.

[Qwerty]

Kids are very demanding. Mentally and physically.

[Qwerty]

Totally worth it though.

[Zoe]

Thanku for the positive review about having kids.

I believe u.