It was for a surgery that would improve my mental/emotional wellbeing significantly and now it’s postponed again because of an EXTREMELY rare cardiac event that fortunately did not result in any permanent damage. I think it was because of the psych meds I take and how they didn’t know that it would effect my blood pressure (which is still pretty low). I woke up in recovery and they told me they had to abort because my heart almost stopped and I was completely alert and lucid but confused why that even happened. Next thing I know I’m being rushed in an ambulance sirens on to a big hospital to have all sorts of cables and IVs hooked into me.
Probably one of the worst days of my life. I had to spend the night with said cables hooked up and I couldn’t sleep very well. I managed to come home yesterday and at no point did I ever feel like I had a heart attack or problem of any kind. They did a CT of my chest and an echocardiogram, so I have about two years-worth of radiation exposure down so far this year.
Every time I get close to getting this surgery done, something happens and it gets pushed back. I’m so angry and I can’t even put it into words. I certainly can’t in this board but when I was leaving the hospital with my parents the stress set off my paranoia because I was in the middle of a city and I saw everyone as if they were looking right at me or speaking to me. I hate being outside.
It was an awful day.