Yes, I agree with @GoldenRex on this. It could have gone really BAD for both of you. I’m just relieved it didn’t. 
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wow dude…I agree with @GoldenRex that ain’t pillow talk baby !! it’s over…next time let them know you’re sz before you go to bed with them and you shouldn’t get yourself hurt again.
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It’s a difficult reality to face as a male with schizoaffective disorder. I know it.
The reality, unfortunately, is that if you put that you’re schizoaffective on your dating profile (or whatever you use), you’re going to get passed over by over 90% of the population, perhaps more.
I initially tried to date without putting this on my profile (when on sites like OKCupid, etc.). The harsh (again) reality is that they’re going to ask you questions and it’s going to come out eventually (that you are mentally ill). You have one of two choices, seemingly: 1., Put it on your profile that you’re SZA and make a nice explanation that you are stable or, 2., Don’t put it on your profile and have them discover, a few dates in – that you are schizoaffective.
If you take option 2, you are opening yourself up to a world of hurt. …because you fall in love with the person and then they crush your heart (and stigmatize the hell out of you in the process).
If you take option 1, you are basically embracing and accepting the rejection from the getgo and if anyone contacts you or answers your emails (while dating online), you’ve got half a chance, hell, maybe a 25% chance that they’ll not dump you for the stigma later on.
I’ve been down this road. Ultimately, I’ve decided that I can only date people with Mental Illnesses, because, whether it’s days, weeks, months or years down the road, the likelihood is that they are going to stigmatize against you. When **** hits the fan, SZA and SZ get dumped in a heartbeat.
This isn’t ALL of the time, but it is representative of the big picture when it comes to those with mental illnesses interacting with ‘normal’ people; especially dating and, above all, *******.
Guard your heart, my friend.
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I respectfully disagree with all that.
You don’t have to tell anyone, as its not their business.
The only times revealing my diagnosis hurt me in a relationship was when I disclosed too early and some jackasses used it against me in fiery break up scenarios.
I think its best to get into a relationship, then tell, not just throw it out to every passing option.
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Respectfully understood and taken, goldenrex.
I’m not trying to say that there aren’t people out there that are ‘normal’ (non-mentally-ill) who would date someone with a disorder like schizophrenia or schizoaffective. They are out there… but, by and by, from my own experiences, I have found that they prefer to date within their own ‘kind’, especially when it comes to schizo diagnoses.
If a person has mild depression or mild anxiety, I can see them not revealing it – because it’s not a big deal (to them or to many people out there). However, schizophrenia enters into a completely different realm, especially on an ethical level.
We really are people – people with problems, but people nonetheless (and I can see how my initial post might have been harsh from that angle)… but that isn’t how the public generally perceives us. What makes it worse is that we have all the same biological desires that the general public have. We want to date and mate.
Ethically, I cannot find it in myself to keep something like that from people, so I flat-out don’t even go on OKC or Tinder. …because I would feel ethically-compelled to tell people – right from the getgo – that I am damaged goods.
That is what online dating is really getting down to in this day and age – it’s like shopping for people; people don’t like it when they get damaged goods, and, generally speaking, they select for the goods that are ‘in tact’.
I don’t know if the OP met this person online. I was just guestimating. The only reason I responded like I did (like a kneejerk reaction, honestly) was because I’ve tried to hide it. Women don’t like things being hid from them – especially diagnoses for illnesses that often include homicidal thoughts, hearing voices and visually hallucinating.
Probably TMI, but I was in a 9-month relationship and chose the former method: of revealing the diagnosis slowly. After 9 months, thousands and thousands of dollars later and much heartfelt dedication, I was dumped, deleted and treated like the plague. I was not a person anymore to that person – to that woman.
I guess, from a male’s perspective, I feel that if you’re going to jump in the pool with non-mentally-ill people online, ethically, it needs to be said. Much can be said about ethics however, so I’m fine with the disagreement. I’m just worried for his heart and I don’t want to see it hardened and callused by rejection after rejection, always wondering why.
Yes, it’s no one’s business, but sex and mating are very personal business. Foreplay is very personal business (at least it is to me)… and I could never again get to that level with a human being without being completely transparent, mostly from the getgo.
Plus, if they dump you because of it, you probably didn’t have much of a chance attracting them with your finer qualities later on, anyway. …and no one wants to be the object of pity, hanging on in a relationship for months or years because the other person doesn’t want to honestly dump you because you’re psychotic (or have psychotic qualities that are controlled by medicine).
I do see how this is a topic for many perspectives, however! Again, I respectfully divert. 
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Heck, I would go to her place and bang her. Excuse my french but It’s been a serious drought in the 77nick77 household.
Something about a mans “member” has no conscience.
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I’m sorry you experienced this. Not all “normal” people respond this way. My husband is as normal as they come. He isn’t and never has been depressed, psychotic, delusional, paranoid, etc., and yet he treats me like a regular person. He isn’t scared of me in the least. Neither is the rest of my family. My sister is sza too, and unfortunately, she has had some bad experiences with outsiders, but she has managed to get married and have children and lead a semi-normal life, even with epilepsy on top of the sza! So it isn’t always bad. Some people will love you regardless.
Now that your hook-up knows better, maybe she’ll treat someone kinder in the future. You never know what kind of difference you made by remaining calm and explaining yourself reasonably. You did the right thing by handling it the way you did. And whether or not you chose to reveal it is a matter of personal preference. That’s for you to decide.
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I’m sorry but what a total ■■■■■■■! If I was you I would not call her again for your own sake. Fair enough she may be ‘ignorant’ but saying something like that is just plain dumb!
You were too good.
In response to “YOU’RE NOT GONNA KIL ME ARE YOU?”, you could have pretended to look shocked and replied casually “Oh, that doesn’t usually happen until the third date”.
You would have either got a laugh, or traumatized her permanently.
I have a terrible track record, so please don’t consider this advice 
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Made me lol big time !
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Lol thanks for all the responses folks. I’m just waking up so don’t have much else to say. But thanks.
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Many “normies” are open-minded enough to observe your behavior and not the label. Even I had doubts about who I was after stopping alcohol. I asked myself how many people I’ve actually hit in my whole life. Answer: maybe two, when I was a 5yo or 6yo. And then, it was self-defense. I have schizophrenia, the big one. Some people will say, “So what?” Means nothing to them – until I say something bizarre about belief in astrology or something their “reason” can’t accept. Whatever. I identify with the need for romantic love. Good for you, having the courage to give it a shot, cat or no cat.
People can be ignorant. I think a lot of people think about schizophrenics is that we are heartliess psychopaths… that is far from her truth. I don’t know how many times I’ve cried because a woman said “I could never love.” “You don’t know what it is.” They’d say. Even though I put my heart and soul into making her smile and happy even though I was hurting inside. If there was a good movie that I knew of schizophrenia other than a Beautiful Mind about John Nash maybe people would think differently. I feel a lot of people are heartless towards schizophrenia but where as if I were to say I was having some other illness I’d probably get a hug not a “we cannot hangout because I Mom says you could be dangerous.”…
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Ignorance can be taken two ways. Ignorance can be an honest lack of knowledge which it seems that you just experienced with this girl. (By the way, does she have a sister?) And the second context of ignorance is if something is done deliberately while knowing better.
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