Schizophrenia.com

I gotta be honest, i miss drugs

Drinking especially.

The others i didn’t do very much, just had a taste, but the drinking, how nice it would be to just have a drink.

Not even in an alchoholic way either, just some here or there, but now i can’t because of meds and this awful thing happening. It just doesn’t feel good anymore.

I used to think that perhaps drinking or drugs caused my problem but nope, that wasn’t the case at all, i was hearing voices way back come to think of it, just didn’t know it at the time, sure they can screw a person up but they aren’t the cause of this ailment, at least not mine anyway. When i heard a voice on the playground telling me i was a schizophrenic i just knew it was someone speaking and didn’t think much of it really, i didn’t understand what schizophrenia even was, and this is long long before i ever took a drink or smoked a joint.

They always do that, they make people think or fear it was the drug or drink, but no, they can come to a person regardless, not that the drug or drink can’t screw with a person, entirely different things though.

Oh well, can’t always get what you want i suppose, or what you need either.

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I drink once in a while even though I am on meds. My mom said that it can just make the meds less effective. But I feel good while I am doing it.

I don’t miss any of the depressants. I don’t miss the alcohol at all. I don’t miss the coke, I really Do NOT miss the pot…

But the wonderful connection of emotions you can get through XTC. I do miss that. A huge shocker came to me recently… Why it was a shock I don’t know… My sis knew when I was rolling. She said when she was young, she loved hanging out with me when I was on E because I was fun and loving and kind.

But I’m not going back to that. It’s like disneyland… a fond memory, but the price of the ticket is too much now.

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I used to be really into drugs. Coke mostly. But I gave it up 8 years ago. Just 2 days ago, this guy I know offered me some coke. Thankfully, I had the willpower to turn it down and get away from him.

Drugs always seem like a much better idea than they really are. NO thanks!

Blessings,

Anthony

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Good for you. That is huge step for any of us. Very cool. :thumbsup:

I’ve been pretty happy with myself for being able to turn down a joint and a drink.

If someone offered me a tab of E. Well, I hope I have a friend with me to tug my arm and say, “we’ve got other stuff to do right now.”

I don’t want to go back, but my brain romanticized the drug beyond reality I think.

I know exactly what you mean. For a split second, my brain went all sneaky on me and started rationalizing using again. I had to just physically walk away and regain my strength and reality!

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I am becoming amazed at how good the brain is at sneaky thinking. I marvel at what it’s been able to rationalize and remember as good and lovely. (more hallucinations and deep confusion with crippling depression when it all wears off… yeah that was fun) Why would my brain want to romanticize that?

I am proud of you for that inner strength. It’s not easy thing to muster.

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I was a heavy drinker, like “how is he not dead?” kind of drinker. I don’t really miss it. I drank to tranquilize myself and without it I felt…like a ■■■■■■■ nutcase, because I was. Now I am on a benzo and it does well to make me sit still and keep me from being nervous or agitated. I honestly don’t miss alcohol, but I miss the social aspect of drinking; its what some kids do as their main pastime. I have a few friends who dont party but they’re going out of state for school and I only see them on breaks.

I also used preworkout supplements to excess sometimes, I would take a dose meant for a 225lb man but I was 160lbs. I did that when I felt down and then it made sleep a lot harder, but I could do crazy weightlifting stuff on it. Like seriously crazy. I remember setting personal records each and every time I took that stuff in excess.

Now I drink less than 400mg of caffeine a day (a general guideline for health I heard somewhere) and dont drink alcohol. I sleep hard as a rock and I am sedated unless I drink caffeine. Watching me wake up is hilarious, it takes me an hour to get dressed and make a coffee.

i don’t drink or do drugs, but i don’t need to , like you guys my mind is tripping 24/7 !
take care

exactly who can afford it?

Marijuana and LSD sped up my hearing voices and made my symptoms increase. I would have become schizophrenic anyway. I quit marijuana because it made my voices loud. Also being hung over makes my voices louder and harder to ignore.

I miss the collecting of friends in a circle, in private, breaking the law. The comradary… the kinship. Not the drug. The drugs really didn’t do anything for me. But when I was doped I could say anything, and people would listen… and it was all funny. It was all curious… and they were my friends.

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i think about weed EVERY single day. even tho i had a full blown weeks long psychoses pretty much the last time i used it. i tried small amts a few times afterwards, and i could feel myself lose control of my mind.

maybe id try a cbd strain. my life is rather boring. when i was using little bits of weed successfully in the past, i was very happy. i had a huge social life. when i quit weed that time, i suddenly lost pretty much all interests in friends. i think about my weed happy times every day.

now that im quitting caffeine for the most part im thinking of it alot.

I feel the same. Such a pastime for youngsters, doing illegal things like drinking liquor and smoking cigarettes and pot felt like the high point of my high school days. We all thought that drugs and alcohol were the best thing ever and our number one interest…now most of my friend still do them. I can’t, they dont agree with schizophrenia or my meds. Alcohol and schizophrenia work pretty well, as alcohol is a major tranquilizer like antipsychotics, but it can make paranoid people disinhibited and violent sometimes.

I used to experiment with drugs and alcohol in my younger years - I haven’t touched a drop of alcohol in years, no drugs either. My ■■■■■■ up brain was not equipped to handle such chemicals. Besides if i really wanted to get high, all I would have to do is get off of my meds. I mean I take meds not to get high or delusional or manic. People take drugs to escape reality - I as a person suffering from schizophrenia and bipolar take meds to embrace some reality.

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My ex and I had a serious marijuana addiction. When I lived in Arizona I had a medical mj license and we had it all the time…now since I’ve divorced and moved to a state that will never even have medical mj, (Oklahoma) I 've been forced to quit…it ruined my marriage and kept us very poor a very long time. My ex still does it through the connects we had when I had a caregiver, and it makes me feel kind of sad…pot ruined my life, and it IS addictive if given enough time…I smoked pot in high school and it seemed harmless…but given all the time I had on disability it consumed me and my ex. I am glad I’ve stopped using it now.

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I was almost at the alter a few years ago, but something in my mind snapped and I was ready to give up drugs and she wasn’t. She stayed on ride and I got off at the next stop. That relationship ended and it was UGLY. But we finally got disentangled from each other.

I heard a few months ago that she overdosed and passed away. I’m 28, she would have been 26. I really feel sorry for her Dad. He really tired hard to get her healthy.

The heartless ■■■■■■■ in me is very glad I didn’t end up there with her.

I have no problems drinking on medication, never have and I have drank heavily on medication many times. The medication turns me to drink, i hate meds they make you feel so depressed, so not yourself and then there’s the side effects. Some people may be happy to take their meds but for me they cause worse problems than the illness.

You know, my doc warned me about the problems that meds cause and asked me if I was sure I needed them. I explained that I was drinking as self-medication and really needed help. He wasn’t lying, the meds cause me akathisia, extreme restless leg syndrome and I take more meds to counter it. I still have a slightly restless left leg, but I can live with it.

It’s about pros and cons. Some people highly function without medication, it all depends on the severity of your case…I needed meds, I was hearing voices 24/7 unless I got really drunk. I managed to make it through my first year of college unmedicated but it was hell, I don’t even like to think about it.

But I know what you mean Grumpycat, alcohol had me for about six months. I can drink moderately now, but I do well to stay away from it. I don’t wanna relapse and I was told that getting completely drunk will interfere with my meds and cause a relapse.

When I was free of meds for nearly five years with no symptoms I drank heavily very often, not every single night but often and would black out all the time. It never made me relapse in all those years but i tried a joint and was straight back in the nut house after all that time being well. Must effect everyone differently.