i don’t leave the house anymore
i’ve isolated myself completely, it’s been months
i don’t even know what i’m scared of
pdoc is more focused on hallucinations than the fact i can’t leave the house
i have no friends, no hobbies and pretty much no will to live,
i don’t eat unless someone makes food,
i don’t get out of bed unless i have to
i’m on antidepressants and ap’s and anxiety meds but nothing is working
sorry for complaining, i’m just venting i guess, not really expecting any advice just…
this is my life exactly, no friends, never had a job and where i used to be excited about being alone now i’m sad and empty and losing the will to live
It’s a tough battle. You are not alone and we are all suffering with this illness to varying degrees. Just know that it can get better, you don’t have to feel this way all the time. Keep up hope that things will change.
Hang in there it gets better with time. Maybe you need a med change. It’s a trial and error process which itself takes time to figure out but you must stay vigilant and don’t give up hope. I wish you the best of luck!!
I’m not trivializing your situation and what you are going through but one aspect of life is that you can make your own luck. Ask the doc or the clinic if there’s a clubhouse for the mentally ill near you. If so, maybe you can just go there once with out committing yourself just to see what it’s like. Ditto for a support group, day program, or some very simple volunteer job.
I read an article about motivation. It said that motivation is not going to just magically strike you one day while you’re in your house eating lunch or watching TV. What you do is build up to it. Start with something simple and small. Take a 5 minute walk or do the dishes or sit on the porch for 15 minutes. Do that 5 days a week for a couple weeks. Then after two weeks of that maybe do some minor yard work task for ten minutes or make a phone call or a bigger chore or fix a meal. Once you make it this far, you will feel a small sense of accomplishing something. Then you build on it.
Walk to the store for a candy bar during the day or mail a letter or read a magazine. This is how you get motivation. I don’t know if you have stores near you or a mailbox or a lawn but you get the idea.
Recovery ain’t easy, it can take years but life can change on a dime and opportunities come up. I understand that maybe this seems simplistic but recovery takes action and taking risks. I’m 57 now, I’ve had paranoid schizophrenia since I was 19; that’s 38 years. In my recovery I have done a boatload of crap that I did not want to do and that I did not like doing at the time. But some of it helped and looking back I’m glad I did it and all that effort built a foundatiin for a decent recovery. These are just my opinions and experiences and it seemed to work for me. I know how hard schizophrenia is and how it’s too easy to get set in your ways, but people change, life changes and there’s a lot of people out there who would like to see you do good.