I don’t want to die tonight. A group of people saying derisive comments to trigger bad thoughts and memories in my mind. But I am not wanting to go to the hospital because afraid of becoming worse. I need people to say positive things about myself. I need love from other people and understanding. Luckily my best friend is there. But I don’t want to annoy her too much. It is too much for her to deal with. I need patience with my self and intrusive thoughts. I always panic when my thoughts and images go downhill. I need to acknowledge them and let it go/pass. That is the only way I will be okay.
Alls I know over the years is that sometimes it’s necessary to ask for help. That isn’t a slight on you it’s just something that comes with the disorder. Sometimes you need more help than what is available. You can’t talk or think your way out of bad times and thoughts. You can’t make others understand what is going on.
Seriously. Take stock. If you need some help then ask for it. Yeah hospital sounds serious but if you need the help you need to ask for it! If you have a broken leg the pain will make you seek some treatment. Sadly. You have a broken brain you’ll do anything but!
Please. Reconsider. If you need some help then do it! It’s not normal to have such symptoms. That is a pretty good sign to seek it!
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