I dont know yet

Here in the quiet of the morning with my coffee and my music playing low I wonder if this is what it would be like if I lived alone. I love this time of the day when no one is wanting something from me. No one is bothering me.

I wonder if I would like living by myself or if I would get lonely. I wonder if I take my family for granted. I wonder should I appreciate them more. It’s only a few months now before my last little fledgling leaves the nest then I’ll have empty nest syndrome, ha ha.

No, I’m actually really looking forward to it, even though I’ll miss him, he is my heart after all. But time marches forward whether we like it or not. Once he’s gone a new world opens up to me. I get to decide how to spend the next chapter of my life and it’s exciting. Scary though. Scary and exciting, and me without an ativan lol.

One thing is for sure I don’t want to stay in this town, it’s dreadful. I’m sick of the weather. it’s 8 months of too cold and 4 months of too hot. The high desert is a harsh climate. It’s expensive to pay to heat your house in the winter and also to cool it come summer. A milder climate would be lovely. I don’t like the snow either. It makes me anxious. And dealing with snow tires every year is expensive and a pain in the ass. And dealing with other people not taking their time in the icy conditions is stressful. So I’ll be happy to say goodbye to this town.

But I have lived here for 20 years and it has become home, so it will be a little sad to say goodbye to all my friends, and community in general. There is something so comforting about a small town. There’s a kind of security in knowing that you will always be around someone you know when you go out and about. The town I’m considering moving to isn’t too much bigger but you won’t know people like that.

My reward? Anonymity. That will be nice to. Getting away from the fishbowl effect. Sometimes you just want people out of your business. I know, I know, you can’t have it both ways. I’m ready for a bigger town. Dang, we don’t even have a Walmart or fast food we’re so little. I would eat the heck out of a big mac. Anyway we’ll see what changes come my way. The possibilities are exciting.


I’ve lived in Springfield, Virginia since I was born thirty-five years ago. I’ve seen it grow from a suburban farming environment to a place that is a major artery for highways. It’s stressful, everybody’s commuting to DC, and my friends have all grown apart from me.

When I spent time in Oakland it was like a whole new world. There’s something great about a new place. My mother moved out there first, and I’m so glad she did. She also lived here her whole life without moving. She and her high school sweet heart, who also grew up in Springfield, are happy over there right now.

I can’t wait to move. You can always visit later if you have someone who will let you crash at their place. Plane tickets aren’t too expensive if you can dodge hotel fees and maybe borrow a friend’s car when you arrive.

Also California’s weather is so much better than Virginia’s. I don’t mind saying goodbye to snow. I’d ask you where you’re moving to/from because I’m curious but I don’t want to pry.

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