Schizophrenia.com

I don't know if any women like me or not

I can’t tell, lol. Sometimes I think they are being nice to me because they like me. Other times I think they’re just acting. Well hell, what the hell do I expect from them? They should just magically like me for no reason?
I will keep being polite and friendly and respectful to most of them ( but not all of them of course, there’s plenty of both men and women who in my book do not deserve respect ), however they feel about me because that’s how my mother raised me. I know girls are only human and are dealing with their own issues and I know most women, whether they are pretty or not, or have a good personality or not, they will have a hundred guys competing to get to know them. Maybe I’m exaggerating a little.

But I know they have to do what’s best for themselves and look out for their own self interests. They can’t like everybody, and just because I like them doesn’t mean they have to like me back. Sh*t, I sound like a damn sixth grader. Oh well.

As John Cougar Mellonkemp says:
“Oh yeah, life goes on,
Even after the thrill of living is gone”.

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After reading a number of your posts, I would describe you as intelligent, kind, sentimental, diplomatic, and possessing a great sense of humor. All attractive qualities. Why wouldn’t the women around you find you attractive? :blush:

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Well, thank you for that, it made me feel good. Most of the women where I live are in their twenties or thirties, too young. But the lady that serves lunch at my job has offered to fix me up with some women in my age range a couple of times. Maybe I’ve got to put out more effort. Thanks again.

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It would be nice for you to go on some dates. I’ve tried it, but I don’t like someone giving up on me after only meeting me twice. I think you have a shot. You can always ask for advice here. It’s a reason to get dressed up.

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Hold their hands, if they like you they will be happy

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you are funny and kind, I like you

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Well, thanks. I didn’t expect that. That’s very nice of you.

I like you too. You have always been thoughtful and kind in your posts

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Thanks ish!..I’m kind of fond of you too.

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everyone deserves love, in my opinion. I have been so incredibly lucky to find TWO women who loved me, I still hurt over Sam, who died on me (I would strangle God, but I’m pretty sure he’s a vindictive asshole who would kill someone else to get revenge) but I have Yuki now.

You cant find it if you don’t give it a shot, took me six months of dating a bitch to figure out I liked Yuki and she liked me, but hey it seems to be working out!

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I had a therapist named Yuki.

that is cool, my Yuki is not Asian, despite everyone she meets asking that. Her mother was a Japanese Arts student or something and just loved the name, it means Snow, and she was born in a blizzard :smile:

OK, that’s kinda neat.

Bettr than my name >.< Javan means Angelic in reference to the Angel Gabriel, but in its original form (in the language my mom used it in) its more like a version of Gabrielle…my name is a girls name…

Something important to remember is that a lot of women grow up having it drilled into our heads that being “nice” is more important than anything, more important than being honest, genuine or even smart about navigating relations. Now some women will grow their own figurative backbone and learn to resist this and be just respectful, but not fake “nice”. Some women will swing too hard the other way in an effort to overcome the conditioning, and they wind up with this sort of punk bitch attitude. But when a woman is being very “nice” to you, it’s usually just that nervous conditioning. If it’s a customer service situation, like your waitress, then she has to be “nice” as part of her job, as well.

One sign that a woman actually likes you (even if just as a friend, but could be more) is that she will treat and react to you differently than with others. This can take some observing to notice, but like if she goes out of her way to talk with you or be near you, smiles and laughs (genuinely) more with you than with others (not the nervous laughter kind), or if she goes in for an arm/shoulder touch while joking around (that can be a huge sign if she doesn’t normally touch people). If she talks with you about stuff she doesn’t have to, but it’s just because she wants to. Stuff like that.

And most women don’t have hundreds of pursuers, no. Very attractive women might get “hit on” more often, but it’s mostly unwanted, crass or creepy attention, not genuine chances at real bonding. Your average looking women don’t get hit on very often at all, it’s just not like that. But women do often seem “aloof” which can give guys the impression that it’s because we just have so many options that we’re sitting comfortable and full of ourselves. The reality is that we tend to be a lot more cautious than you guys for both instinctive and culturally conditioned reasons. But then we don’t want guys to feel bad, so we try to make it seem like we’re not actually wary of them, just indifferent, which comes across as “aloof” more often than not.

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Hey @77nick77

Not only are you a nice guy you are cool too!!!

Take care Kate xxx

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That is interesting that you mentioned that women in their 20ties and 30ties are too young for you. After reading your posts I have always imagined you as a guy in this age range… such internal youth I believe is always attractive to women… nice and cool… :sunglasses:

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I’m a guy, and I tend to be “nice” due to a nervous condition. That kind of “niceness” can be deadly to romantic relationships. I’ve gotten so used to being single that I take actions to reinforce that solitude. I’m not as needy about women as I used to be. If they can take me with all my flaws that’s super, but I don’t try to force myself on them. I’m 57, and I don’t see myself settling down with a partner for the rest of my life. I’ve gotten too used to being alone. I might surprise myself, though. Anything can happen.

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Life has a bag of tricks for everyone. It could be good, it could be bad and it comes when you least expect it.

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Thanks once again Katey.