I am sorry I complain and vent here, but I do not know what else to do.
My grandmother has dementia , she keeps going to the cooker so when my mother is not at home I am there to keep an eye on her. It is so scary. I am NOT her carer, but I am there to help my mum.
My partner is clearing out his house so he can put it on the market but it is taking a long time… I sometimes get so fed up that I don’t think these dreams of moving are going to materialise.
Some feel I should just move in with him. He lives 2.5 hours away on the train, and is outside of London. It costs me money to travel to where he is.
And if I decide to live with him there permanently, I would lose my London freedom pass. I won’t be able to travel home without it costing me a fortune that I basically do not have. I need to be at home sometimes because I just don’t want my mum to be alone.
My freedom pass means I can travel anywhere in London for free on the train or on the bus. It has been a lifesaver for me and has saved me so much money.
So we want to remain within London so I don’t lose that little independence I have.
I do not want to be reliant on him to get me everywhere. I feel he’d grow to resent me if I was totally dependent on him like that.
well it depends will your partner be able to comfortably financially support you if you move to him? then it would be up to him to pay the travel fees…? i d k
it cost in the region of 20 pounds to get to where he is each way, the reason he works from home and not in London (where his job is based) is to save money.
the way I see it splitting the bills down the middle is the way it should be…it’s not that way here in my house…we live on my check…but she is pending disability soon…and then we will split the bills…or no go…he can’t keep his savings and expect you to shuck out the cash for you to see your mom.
If I move in with him I won’t get the benefits I get. I will only get £405 a month… but thats going to be the case either way I will have to look for a job I guess…
Can your dose be lowered to allow it to be easier to be employed? I’ve noticed by going down to 10mg abilify, my somnolence or general tiredness has improved quite noticeably (I still use caffeine pills, but I almost don’t even have to )
I know it sounds stupid that I care so much about this pass, but it’s been a reason for me to get out of the house… without it I wouldn’t be doing anything … I go to the park on my own… how will I do that if I live with him. he’d have to pay it all… @MisterApple I have asked about lowering the dose to 5mg ability but I have not heard anything yet… I feel I am ready to work but I struggle with interviews.
if he wants you, make him pay…especially if he has the cash…time to be a man, is this the same guy you have been dating all this time? why did you decide not to marry? don’t you have your home right now under your parents roof? I can’t remember…sorry…
I recently found there’s a programme for disabled people (called the work and health programme) that you can ask about at the job centre which may include support for interview preps
I don’t feel it’s fair to make him pay, I’d feel guilty not being able to contribute. Obviously it’s not going to be half and half though. I don’t want him to drive me everywhere I still want my independence, I don’t think people get this. but I want to go places without him too… I don’t need or want him to take me everywhere I want a partner not a carer.
thank you @MisterApple I am currently with a charity who support me to look for work… but I will get in contact with the job centre if they can help too. I am so frustrated that I don’t have a job at this point. its been over a year.
I’m similar, I have a two year absence from work profile now and I know nobody will accept me for work.
I think the linked programme will prove helpful, if the work coach assigns it to you then they’ll maybe even support you during times of psychosis without losing your job due to law requirements of discriminatory practice. after all it’s a government programme