Hypervigilance of symptoms

I feel like I’m constantly on guard that I’m having signs of going psychotic. Every little symptom that happens and I’m like all on alert “is this it?”. I’m so concerned that I’m hallucinating or delusional that I’m probably causing myself to be psychotic. It’s not right. I think I’m a hypochondriac version of sza. I’m wound up so tight I’m bound to snap one of these days.

Try to relax !! I used to worry too but now I know I would have at least a week or two of stableness to go in to the pdoc if I had to…good luck.

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My pdoc is concerned I may have a little ptsd due to my breaks from reality. I’m like you, one small breakthrough voice or visual and I have a hard time keeping it together, a constant on edge that it’s going to get as bad as it’s been in the past.

What kind of tools do you use to help fight the feelings?

I personally find reality checking with my SO, and the use of centering exercises to help somewhat

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I’ve been there. It took time and the right med. I like to think all those meds I took did something positive.

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I’m the same. I’m constantly monitoring my thoughts and feelings and if something is off… just a fleeting odd thought, or a dash of anxiety, feeling a little overenergetic, or anything else that is not supposed to be there… I’m scared I’m turning psychotic. I’m afraid of relapsing and especially of hurting my son in relapse. I’m contemplating using more meds, but I know I’ll feel horribly blunted and depressed then.

If I’m out doing active things - work, social stuff, volunteering - I have less time to be focused on myself, so I’m doing better. Do you feel a difference between being quietly at home or doing active stuff that doesn’t let you focus on yourself?

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I don’t know because I’ve been at home for about 5 years. I don’t handle being away from home very well. I get really anxious and feel like I have to get home so I can relax and de-stress. I try to stay busy at home and focus on things other than my symptoms but when a symptom appears I worry, even if it is only in the back of my mind.

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